Open Your Arms

Chapter 76

June 13, 2006

Kat Von D only comes over to Bam's house when Ville is over and that bothers me. Why is she so obsessed with him? Every chance she gets to touch him, she takes it. 

I mean, I don't blame her but she needs to learn some self control. Even Missy noticed it, too. 

Ville can't even get in the pool, so he's sitting out while we're all swimming. Kat doesn't swim either, yet she's wearing a bathing suit and is all over him. 

I'm trying my hardest to not let me jealousy show, but it's not working out so well. It's so pathetic how I still have feelings for him, yet we broke up two years ago. 

I decided to get out of the pool a little while ago and sit under the shade while sipping on my lemonade, unlike everyone else out here drinking alcohol. 

"Well aren't you fancy drinking your lemonade?" Ryan gently squeezes my shoulders and sits down next to me, in between Ville and I. Kat is on the other side of Ville and is very close to him, but for some reason she's not touching him. 

That's a first. 

"I try," I joke and take another sip of it in spite of what he said. 

I miss how things used to be. I miss my old life. Hailey is off with her own family, Axl's trying to get himself back together, and I'm hanging out with Missy every day. 

Most people would kill to have the life that I do, but sometimes it's exhausting. It feels like it's just repetition at this point. Just a huge cycle. 

Countless empty bottles of beer sit up on the table. It disgusts me how much everyone drinks. It's not healthy or good for anyone at all. 

"So...what do you do?" Kat asks me. 

I raise an eyebrow. "What do you mean?"

"What do you do for a living?"

I chortle. "I don't do anything."

"Then how do you get money?" She asks in a condescending tone. 

I mimic her tone. "My parents give me money because they're rich." I sound really stupid saying that out loud, but it's the truth. 

"Wow," She says sarcastically. "That's impressive."

I choose to ignore her and continue to drink my lemonade. She's not worth my stress. I have too much to stress about anyway. 

"Nice shirt," Novak nudges my shoulder. "Do you slit your wrists?"

I glance down at the shirt I put on after I got out of the pool, forgetting what it looked like, and I gasp as I realize why he said that. "Novak, that's fucking terrible."

"I don't get it," Ryan says, unable to look at my shirt because the edge of the table is blocking it. 

"It's a Marilyn Manson shirt," I roll my eyes and kick Novak in the shins. "Fucking asshole."

"Do you remember when we met him?" Ville asks me. This one of the numerous times that we've spoken to each other today. 

I nod, smiling as I remember that day. "Yeah, that was really nice. I wonder if he and his wife are still together."

"I wouldn't be surprised if they weren't," He reaches forward and takes a sip of his beer. "Seems like a nice fellow, though."

"He's not as good now, though," I admit. "He did the same thing that you did and released a greatest hits album, but nothing recent. His last album was good--the Golden Age of Grotesque."