IKIGAI / Jake Sully

Love advice from Jake

"This is what you do." Jake says rubbing Lo'ak shoulder. "Establish eye contact. If she looks back at you for 5 seconds - too long that means she wants you to talk to her"

My ears perked up and and over my shoulder,

"Then, go up there and DON'T talk to her" Jake says making sure to emphasize the 'don't' "Grin, like you wanna fight her."

"What..." I groaned rolling my eyes

"Then, it is essential that you drop a 50 pound boulder on her foot"

"Excuse me...." I say turning to look over my shoulder at the two.

"Not 45, not 49, 50 it has to be exactly 50"

"Dad, why 50" Lo'ak asks

"Enough to break her foot, but not kill her"

"You're joking...." I say actually needing to turn completely around now.

"Shhh, baby" Jake tells me "I'm having a teaching moment with my son" He says shooing me off like I was a bug on his knee. "Then! She's going to yell at you"

"How is this helping him...." I ask

"She's going to be like - I can't believe you broke my foot how dare you?! Then you're going to reply - I'm so sorry I was stunned by your beauty but I can bandage it for you"

"Wha...." Lo'ak stutters "Uh...where am I gonna get bandages?"

"Hello???? Here? That's where you invite her back here." Jake says and immediately pull Lo'ak back from him.

"DO NOT LISTEN TO FATHER" I protested looking at him. "If you like a girl you just go up and tell her she is pretty and say you want to be friends"

"Ugh god. That never works!" Jake shoots back "friend?! You're essentially putting him up for failure. He doesn't wanna be her friend?"

"Friendship turn into relationships"

"I wasn't your friend when we first dated" Jake reminds me "Listen Lo'ak you gotta be original, there are others trying to gun for that same spot, you want her to notice you. Break her foot"

"OR she will hate you" I threaten "then what? Now you don't get friend of the girl"

"Then she isn't the one, the crazy ones will be the ones who'll try to snap your neck" Jake shrugs "and we prefer feisty women over here right Lo'ak?" Walking over and throwing an arm over his son.

"Hell yeah"

"Yeah let's not do that in front of your mom, she's going to kill me" Jake whispers to him and I just glare at the both of them.

"I am going to kill you." I threaten "Lo'ak I hope you like spending this last morning with your dad because I'm throwing him over the cliff side"

"See feisty"

"If you weren't holding my son hostage I would gut you" I growl

"Well that's why I'm standing over here aren't I" Jake replies laughing nervously "NOW, remember, I'm your Olo'eyktan! You kill me and guess who's next in line?! That's right! Tsu'tey you want to deal with him for the rest of your life?!"

"I'll just kill Tsu'tey too."

"Then TRU?"

"HE'S DYING WITH BOTH OF YOU"

"Mom, you're acting pretty scary"

"Do you want to be buried along with all your uncles?"