Oneshots: Elmax / Sillie

Afraid of love

Max had been dating El for around 2 months now, maybe 3. El had invited her over for a sleepover and together the pair lay on her bed, half asleep. Honestly these past few months have been nothing but amazing, and her relationship with El was miles better then it was with her ex.

Daniel wasn't a good person, and he definitely didn't give Max a good impression on dating. But when El asked her out, she had to admit she had liked her for a while, but maybe staying friends was always better in the long run, that way you don't know the real them.

So far though, the 'real' El seemed to be the same as the El she had become best friends with.

But her past relationship still left that bad mark on her, and she was afraid of doing something that will perhaps change what was going so well for her right now.

Max sighed and rested her head on El's shoulder, not wanting to linger on the bad memories right now.

She felt El's hand go up her back and her arm wrapping around her waist.

"Hey, Max?" El spoke quietly as it was pretty late.
"Hmm?" The other girl hummed, opening her eyes just a bit.

"I love you."

Max froze, she could practically feel the ice start to creep up her veins. 'Not again, please not again.' She thought.
"...what?" She asked, her voice barely above a whisper.
El looked at her, "I said I love you." She pushed, making eye contact with her so she knew she meant it. "Max?"

"I have to go." Was all she could muster out. The rapid beating of her heart drowned out whatever El was saying in the background.
She could feel her breath quickening as she grabbed her house keys from the bedside table.

El grabbed her arm firmly and held her in place.

Max shook her head, trying to pull away. "I can't." She choked out. She took a few shallow breaths before she felt tears spill onto her cheeks.

El's hand moved up her arm and around her as she pulled her into a hug.

The pair sat back down on the bed, and Max moved on top of her, just to solidify the fact that El wasn't leaving. She wasn't going anywhere and neither was Max.

"You don't- you don't love me." Max sobbed, burying her head in the crook of El's neck. Taking deep breaths, and clinging onto El's shirt.

She soon felt panic shoot through her body, the urge to run so strong that the only thing stopping her from doing just that was the steady heartbeat of the girl holding her.

"Baby..." El whispered, her hand moving up to run through Max's soft hair, trying her best to show her words were permanent and nothing but the truth. "I love you. You don't have to say it back but I do Max, I love you so much."

"Something will happen and it'll make you change your mind, trust me." Max murmured into against her warm skin, "It- it's just something that happens."

El felt sorrow slowly make it's way into her heart, sadness that Max could think like that.

She pulled away enough to look at her, and she held Max's face in her hands.

"Do you know how messed up of a thing you would have to do to make me stop loving you?" She asked as her thumbs wiped away the tears still rolling down her cheeks. "I'm talking some fucked up shit, and even then I doubt I'd stop."

Max melted into her touch, grimacing as if it physically hurt her to be told these things.

"I love you, I will keep loving you even when we fight, even when I am so so mad at you Max I will still love you more than anything. And I want you to know that." She gave Max a small smile and placed a gentle kiss on her lips, hoping she'd no longer feel the need to hide things like that from her anymore.

"I love you too." Max said into the kiss, just barely above a whisper. She pulled away and smiled, "Sappy piece of shit."
"You're the one crying!" El laughed. Max tightened her grip around El, her breath starting to regulate.

She found herself laughing too, and after a few moments of comfort, El laid down, bringing Max down with her.

She kissed the top of Max's head as she rested her head just beneath her chin, snuggling up to her.

"I'm sorry." She said as El lifted the blanket over her shoulders.
"Don't apologise, I'm glad we got to talk about it." Her girlfriend replied, lying back down.

Max stretched her arm out, leaving her hand spread out loosely against El's chest, and one leg hanging off the side of the bed as the other stayed intertwined with Eleven's.

"I love you." She mumbled, half asleep.
El smiled, wrapping an arm around her waist, "I love you too."

Max was happy she felt this warmness in her heart at the words rather than the initial panic. She felt that old pain leave her body, and was no longer inclined to be afraid of new love.