"Everything I Never Told You"

Chapter |14| Kennedy

The only thing I've done since I woke up is watch Harry Potter to calm down after last nights episode.

I haven't left my room and am not in the mood no socialize nor have to pretend to fit in so that the real me, the broken me, doesn't kill the happy vibe of everyone.

I'm so tired of faking it. But I don't want to show how I really am and feel.

I'm just going to lay in bed for a while watching The Chamber of Secrets, one of my favorites of the movies, and trying to relax. Whatever that word means.

Tears well up in my eyes when Harry fights with his life to save Ginny and get her out of the chamber. I get emotional by their love and these scenes always does it for me.

It's like deep down I want that...not an evil kid who's not going to have a nose in the future to kidnap me and almost kill me...but someone that would care like Harry does for Ginny and save me.

Even though I'm far from salvation.

— "Kenny, you awake?" Keila knocks on my door.

I pause the movie and tell her to come in.

When she looks at my state, all curled up in bed with the blanket to mi chin and Harry Potter on the laptop, she starts laughing.

— "Your obsession with those movies is worrying. You see them like every two weeks".

She's not wrong. Since I'm little I've been obsessed with the Harry Potter universe.

— "Put on a hoodie, is freezing. And come downstairs, we're all having breakfast".

I nod, get out bed and put on a hoodie and pants to cover my scars, not because of the cold, and leave the room.

Surprisingly Keila sits next to my brother when we enter the dining room.

— "Morning" I greet in general and take the place next to Brooke.

Keila, Alex and Jax say good morning to me. Reed, who's sitting in front of me, just nods

— "I'm seriously so hangover" Brooke groans as she takes a sip from her enormous cup of black coffee.

I grab a ham and cheese croissant, some mini cupcakes and a waffle.

I take a sip of my orange juice and place a little brownie on my plate.

My eyes catch Reed's, who's grinning at my plate, and when his eyes look up to mine, I give him a small smile over the glass on my mouth.

— "That's because you drink like you don't have organs to take care of" Jax remarks.

— "If you didn't have to train to get into the NFL you would be even more of an alcoholic than me" Keila adds.

— "She's right" Reed speaks, his low voice half sleepy.

— "How's training? What leagues are you interested in?" Keila asks Alex and Reed.

— "Chicago, definitely" Alex doesn't think his answer "Sponsors are going to be at the match we're having in December. Pretty much the most important one".

Sponsors. Football matches. I realize Keila's taking about their futures. And it makes sense since their graduation in less than a year and are probably leaving the state.

My chest closes up at thinking about my brother leaving and how I'll be completely alone by myself. Fear of not knowing what to do to control myself if I have a suicide impulse and not having the relief that he's just 10 minutes away from me if iI need him.