"Everything I Never Told You"

Chapter |17| Kennedy

I walk without energy to the cafe where I'm meeting up with Keila to breakfast together.

I've been carrying a knot in my chest that weights me down since I woke up this morning. Dreaming about mom and the memories of us together was what broke me down.

Not even the medication helped me to calm down or motivate me. Because all I want to do is rot in my bed all day while watching a movie.

I just miss her so much.

So, when Keila called me an hour ago and told if we could breakfast together because she wanted to spend more time with me, I couldn't say no even if I'm not in the best mood Keila needs in her friend.

I owe her that much, to put my issues aside and focus on my best friend for a while which I feel I haven't been doing for a very long time, since I'm so lost on myself. Because she was always there for me.

And also, a selfish part of me is afraid that if I don't give her the attention she wants from me, she'll walk away. As much as I have Jax, Keila is a different type of person in my life which is one of the reasons why I'm still standing and from time to time manages to make me laugh and forget about all the shit in my life. I really appreciate her.

I couldn't care less of my appearance today. I put on some jeans with a t-shirt, not even bothering with make up on my face nor on my wrists. I just thrown on a hoodie.

I'm not trying today. I don't have the strength nor the desire. Damn, I'm pretty sure I look like shit, but I really couldn't care.

Regardless, I put on a mask of fake happiness as I enter the cafe as to not be a shitty friend and ruin the atmosphere with my mood.

The place is nice. Is a half bookstore half cafe. I love it.

— "Hey Kenny" Keila greets me with a smile as soon as I sit down across from her at the table she chose. "Good thing you agree to come, otherwise I was going to kill you".

I try not to overanalyze her comment.

— "Of course" I smile at her and open up the menu to see what I can order.

Breakfast is probably my favorite meal of the day. I couldn't miss coffee for anything.

The waitress approaches us a few seconds later to ask us what we are going to order. Kei orders a black coffee with a fruit salad, specifying no sugar three times, while I order a venti vanilla latte with a stack of 4 pancakes with Nutella and cream.

Like I said, I love breakfast and food. And today I plan to drown my traumas and demons in a good number of calories.

— "I really envy your ability to eat junk food all the time and not gain any weight. I barely drink a glass of water and already look like I'm nine months pregnant".

I frown a little at Keila's comment and wonder why she does this type all the time.

— "Um, well... I love to eat and don't really care about gaining weight" I admit and giggle a little "I love food, and you should too. You're literally gorgeous, Kei. Some pancakes are going to make your life better, trust me".

Keila widens her eyes at my comment, a little surprised and a little afraid.

— "Um...whatever. I was thinking and wanted your opinion on Thanksgiving dinner at my house. I thought it would be a good idea to invite Reed, Alex and Brooke. We're all very close friends now and it would be super fun. Of course, there are a few weeks left but you know how mom is, she wants me to let her know everything in advance".

— "Yeah. I think it's a good idea" I tell.

Keila nods while the waitress appears with our orders and doesn't waste second to dive into her cup of coffee.