"Everything I Never Told You"

Chapter |28| Kennedy

I open my eyes and a headache instantly invades me.

What the hell happened? And where am I?

I rub my forehead as if that would ease the pain as my gaze scans the room I'm in.

It takes me a few seconds to realize it's from Reed. I'm at Reed's house.

I turn to my side, but the other side of the bed is empty, sheets rustled indicating there was a body lying next to mine just a few minutes ago.

Why am I here? What happened?

— "Morning." His voice disperses me from my thoughts and my gaze wanders from my lap to the door.

Reed is leaning against the frame, one hand holding a cup that I assume has coffee and the other some pills.

Hangover safe.

But no. I do not drink.

I can't drink. Not only because he reminds me of that night, but because I'm also on medication.

No. No. I didn't. I couldn't have.

I must have hit my head or something to feeling this...headache. Not hungover.

I don't drink. I hit my head. I didn't drink.

— "You okay?" His voice again brings me back to reality.

This time he approaches me and hands me the cup along with the tablet of pills.

I take them and thank him. Then I take out 1 pill and swallow it with the tea, not coffee, that he brought me.

Reed sits next to me and watches me, but I don't dare look at him because the memories from last night are starting to clear in my head.

The anniversary of mom's death.

We went out to a bar with Keila and Brooke.

I got very drunk.

— "Oh, fuck" I murmur to myself and this time I do turn to Reed who gives me a small smile, which he doesn't feel much of. He looks concerned.

Oh God. What the hell did I do yesterday?

If Jax finds out...ohgod, ohgod, ohgod. I'm so stupid.

How could I do this? Last time I got this drunk it didn't end well. Not at all.

Oh god, don't think about Will. Not now, please not now.

— "I...I'm sorry...I don't remember exactly what happened but...I'm sorry for b-bothering you with it" I cannot stop blurting words out of my mouth. "I should go".

I put the cup on the nightstand and stand up.

I look down at myself and notice that I'm wearing some joggers and hoodie of his.

Thank god my scars are not visible for him to see.

— "You threw up as soon as we arrived here. I gave you the clothes...you dressed up yourself" he clarifies, and I sight relived.

Not because I'm scared of Reed touching me. I trust him.

But I do am scared of him seeing my scares and the reflection of the failure I am.

I don't want him to see this part of me.

I have to get out of this house. Get away from Reed, at least for a few hours.

I can't bear being a burden in his life and use him as my anchor because I cannot deal with my own problems and feelings.

He doesn't deserve that. I don't deserve him.