𝐓𝐎 𝐁𝐄 𝐋𝐎𝐕𝐄𝐃

if i ever leave

ellie's pov:

i cried on the end of abby's bed as she rubbed my back, kissing my head. "i just wanted comfort," i whined, my breath getting heavier.

"i don't know what i did wrong."

she pouts, "sometimes we look for comfort in the wrong people, ellie."

"can you promise me something?" i ask, wiping my tear as i looked up at her. she shrugs, "depends."

"if i ever leave, will you promise to stay here and be happy for me?"

her smile fades. "go where?"

"away, that's all i'm saying."

she slowly backs away, her mouth agape. "are you gonna hurt yourself?"

"no, no," i repeat. "not that."

"then what do you mean?"

i smile in nervousness. "nothing, forget it." i say getting up to grab my things.

"you're not leaving."

the feeling of her arms wrapping around my waist made me flinch, slowly backing into her. "shh shh, it's okay."

"relax," she whispers, rubbing my stomach as i laid down. "i'm here."

i wanted to fight back but i couldn't, for some reason i felt content. "what?" i whisper as her hands basically held me down.

"you're not leaving, not now."

leaning into her i accept, my eyes fluttering shut.

i know i can't stay, no matter how many times i tell her or anyone else i'm not gonna hurt myself i know i'm lying straight through my teeth.

lying hurts me, it's not like i want to do it but it would be worse to tell the truth.

sometimes lying to get out of an uncomfortable situation is best, in my opinion.

i don't remember much, i guess i fell asleep or something but when i woke up i was alone.

"abby?" i call, and a couple moments later the door swings open. "hey mama," she greets.

"ew, stop."

she chuckles handing me a plate of something. "orange chicken and rice. your favorite, remember?"

"when did you get this?" i gasp, and she smiles. "i ran over to the chinese food place while you were asleep."

grabbing the plastic fork on the plate i immediately dig in, stuffing my face. "slow down before you die."

i chuckle, my mouth full of food. "i haven't had anything this good in awhile, holy shit." i say between bites. "chill, it's all yours."

i slow down, basically laughing my ass off as she stares at me in disgust.

finishing up i grab a napkin, abby lifting a small handheld dumbbell on the end of her bed.

"when are you not using that?" i chuckle, and she turns around. "when are you not insulting me?"

"no comment."

abby's pov:

i got up to throw ellie's trash out before continuing to lift my weights, i swear i do this every other second.

my room is decorated in gym equipment, the only thing in here not gym related would be my bed honestly.

that too has some black dumbbells and treadmill silhouettes around it. i'm a bit of a gym rat.

every time ellie comes over she makes fun of me for it, i couldn't care less though.

looking over i watched as she gazed up at the tapestries on my ceiling, one really caught her eye.

it was a rainbow tye dye, a small black sun in the middle. "where'd you get that?" she asks, and i shrug.

"amazon probably, i got it for my birthday."

she looked down, now making eye contact with me. "i want it."

"too bad, get your own loser." i joke and she scoffs, punching my arm. "oh i'm the loser?"

i nod, "says the one with weights on her wall."

"okay okay, too far."

—

it's now 7pm, ellie's still at my house.

after a lot of convincing she finally gave in and agreed to spend the night, it's not like i see her that much anyway.

we've been playing video games for god knows how long, not the ones on the ps4 but the silly little gamepigeon games on imessage.

not my idea obviously, she's loved these things since she was a kid.

we've been stuck on playing darts for the past hour, she said she won't stop until she wins.

"you're not beating me, just stop trying." i laugh, snatching her phone. "yeah?"

she flings one last dart, hitting the bullseye and winning. "say that shit again."

"about time you won." i say, rolling my eyes playfully. "alright dude, just admit you're bad."

shutting off my phone i lay back, ellie also.

"you know, el? i really enjoy hanging out with you." i admit, i'm not one for sweet talk but it feels necessary.

"why?" she chuckles. "how could i not?"

she scoffs shaking her head looking up at the tapestry once again. "stupid," she says under her breath.

"says the one who's bad at darts."

5 days.