Two Halfs of One Warrior • Obikin/Vaderwan One-Shots

My Heart and Soul Were Never Mine to Own

• Summary: Sith Anakin is obsessed with Obi-Wan, but seeing Obi-Wan as the Jedi Guard of Senator Padmé makes it so much worse. She’s blindingly gorgeous and Anakin realizes he’s jealous of each of them for being able to be in the same space as the other. When Padmé announces that she’ll be making a trip to Naboo, Anakin sees his chance to ambush Obi-Wan and Padmé.

It doesn’t go exactly as planned.

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The Dark side was a fickle creature. For most, it was the unrelenting pressure of the deepest parts of the ocean, bearing down on them. For some it was a frigid tundra that kept their senses heightened. For Anakin, it was the raging heat of an inferno; the temperatures of his anger and hate the same as his surroundings. The Dark side was black and endless and a void in the center of him.

It was a black stone palace carved into the surface of Mustafar. It was the seat of power for Anakin in the middle of the turmoil of the lava flowing over the surface of the planet. His master had gifted him this place when his eyes had changed from blue to gold as a reward – or perhaps as a distraction so Anakin would be less inclined to take his masters life now that he was a Sith in his own right.

He was not a lord or a darth, but he was a Sith. The tenants flowed through his veins and settled with an ease than not many felt about the Sith code.

Anakin sat in his obsidian palace, tinkering with a droid he was building – droids were the only creatures not afraid to be in his presence, so Mustafar was a lonely place – with the holonews on low as background noise. He was on the hard stone floor, the innards of a droid splayed out around him, when he heard a familiar voice ring out of the holoprojector.

Padmé Amidala was speaking, her voice strong as she spoke on behalf of her people. Anakin had no use for politics and even less interest in them. It was for a chance, like this, that he might see her.

And him.

Anakin always wondered why the Jedi was so covered up when he was on the holonet. Head to toe, drowning in a brown outer robe, hovering behind Senator Amidala like a ghost. His hands were buried in the sleeves of his robes, his hood down low over his face. Only his red beard could be seen, making Anakin frown.

The last time they’d fought, Obi-Wan had thrown his robe off in a dramatic display, seemingly excited about shedding his Jedi garb. Obi-Wan had called him ‘darling’ and had tried to wound him with sharp words and a silver tongue before their blades met. It was like every other time they clashed, and it left Anakin wanting more.

But Obi-Wan was no mute, sheltered guard as he was on the screen in front of him.

All while the Senator stood giving a speech to the Senate, looking immaculate. Her hair was twisted into some complicated but showed off her long slender neck. She wasn’t dressed as spectacularly as usual (the first time Anakin saw her on screen, then subsequently, him, Amidala had been wearing the navy and yellow shimmery gown that Anakin hadn’t been able to look away from). She only wore a purple cloak, wrapped around her body and pinned on her shoulder. It looked like there was some red jacket underneath, the collar poking out of the top of the cloak just so.

Anakin didn’t care about fancy clothing, but it was hard not to admire her beauty. It was equally as hard not to feel frustrated that he couldn’t admire their beauty together, with that blasted robe covering Obi-Wan’s face.

It wasn’t obvious to anyone else, Anakin thought, that his Jedi, Obi-Wan, and the Senator were together. It wasn’t most people’s first thought that a Jedi would be involved with anyone, but for Anakin, who wanted to see the worst in all Jedi, it was easy to see.