Deep Thoughts (ghost x female reader)

Stuck horrors (chapter 16)

A/n- I'm back bitches , the poetic rizzler is back with another chapter . Enjoy y'all :)

Tw-abuse flashbacks, violence and ptsd

"Your nothing you know that , just another person who is a problem."
Your foster father glared at you as he saw you enter the family room. You watched as your foster father walk over to you and he looked down at you watching as you held your head low before taking his hand and swinging at you , a sharp stinging sensation coming to your face as his hand met with your face. You stumbled back. Bit as you looked at him , feeling that tingling sting feeling linger. You brought your hand to your face as you rubbed your cheek a bit as tears welled in your eyes.

Your foster father walked over to you again before pushing you against the wall and bringing his hand around your throat tightly. You struggled to get him off you as you tried kicking him with your legs but there was no avail as his grip grew tighter.
"If you cry I'll give you something to cry about."
He went to let you go but before he could do anything else it all went blank.

You woke up with a gasp , feeling sweat drip from your head and your chest heaved as you breathed quick and hard. You felt your mind run and your panic set in as you started to spiral for a moment as your breath grew quicker and shorter as you started to go into a panic attack. You tried calming yourself down but nothing worked. You could hear your heartbeat pounding through your ears as you went into a overwhelmed state and you felt as if you reliving that moment. Your hands went yp to your throat as you rubbed it , almost as if you could still feel his hands around your throat. As you were breathing quickly you hear a sudden knock on the door.

"Soul it's ghost , you alright in there?"
Ghost voice rang out from the other side as he heard your panicked state slightly as your breathing was quick.
"I'm fine.."
You spoke in a firm tone regardless of your current state and you tried shaking yourself off.
As ghost heard your response he kept quiet for a moment as he didn't believe you but he didn't question it as he heard you unloc the door and he watched as you walked out , still without your pants and you avoided making eye contact with ghost and you grabbed your pants from the corner you had left them in and you slipped them on along with the gear too had taken off.

As you started to put on your gear ghost kept a eye on your for a moment before informing you about both of yours current situation.
"I've tried getting on comms , didn't work and I've checked outside while you were out and snow died down."
He says in a level headed tone.
You gave a small mod as you fixed the straps of your vest as you finished putting on your gear abs you looked around And let off a shaky breath before speaking.
"We  get outta dodge and we're still stuck here , by the time we get in touch will probally be dead."
You spoke as you walked up the the front door and you check outside seeing the ground lie with only white.
"All we can do is wait."
He said bluntly and as you stepped into the snow you went in about a foot deep.

You pulled your foot back out and stepped inside and you watched as ghost stood back and rummaged around in the cabinets finding some mres.
"Here."
He threw you an mre and you caught it.
You looked at the dark grayish yellow packaging and you looked at him before setting it down. He looked at you n's sighed as he sat down on the floor and started to open up his mre.
"Go Eat."
He spoke again but it was more of a order as he didn't leave much room for argument. You didn't answer and kept quiet as you watched as he started to heat up his food with the little heat pack that came the mre.

"You gonna keep staring or are you gonna eat?"
He glared at you , keeping his dark eyes locked onto yours as he watched your gaze look him up and down. He couldn't lie that you were his type of woman , no nonsense and got straight to the point but one thing that annoyed him was how stubborn you were but he really couldn't talk as he was also really stubborn as well. He knew that you suffered with nightmares , night terrors , panics attacks and more. He knew you had PTSD just by your mannerisms. He knew you didn't trust easy but he also didn't trust easily as well. You were both alike in a way except you were more temperamental than him.

He couldn't lie that he's thought about you pretty often but he didn't want to get attached , he didn't want to get attached be he was slightly at the same time which scared him. His family had been killed but most of all he was abused by them as well. Most things that happened led to him to have no childhood at all. He had to survive. It left him scared and scarred as he didn't want to have any chance of possibly having someone he loved getting killed. So he avoided trying to get attached in total but it wasn't working as he felt himself growing slowly but surely atttached to you. For you on the other hand you often looked at him , maybe admired him a bit but you couldn't come to terms with yourself that you were starting to fall but you wouldn't let yourself show for that. You stood distanced and didn't make room for anyone to get close but as it was for ghost it was the same for you.

"Why are you so stand off-ish?"
He started as he watched his food heat up.
"Why are you such a dick?"
You retorted and he let off a small dry chuckle.
"Touché."
He spoke as he voice few a bit quieter as he observed you.
"...actually I got a question..."
You started and his eyes widned a little as he was shocked that you asked a question as you were mostly quiet and stand offish as he said earlier.
"What did you mean a few hours ago with the whole bullshit comback...and what did you tell soap?"
You questioned and he huffed.
"Told him that relationships within the ranks are forbidden."
He muttered as he didn't tell the full truth.
"What type of Jedi order bullshit is that."
You mumble and he shook his head.

"Don't worry about that , what you should do is eat, unless you rather me force feed you."
He spoke as he lifted his mask halfway only showing his lips , his sharp jawline with a slight bit of stubble showing. He has a few light scars on his slightly cracked pink lips. You looked at him and your eyes lingered for a bit too long and you looked away as he called you out on it.
"Like what you see eh?"
He grinned and you rolled your eyes.
"Fuck off already."
You growled and he kept a small smirk as he picked up his hot meal. The steam coming off it making a light smoky stream in the air from the opposite temperature.
"I'd bet you'd like that."
He says and your lips formed into a thin line.
"See it's that comeback shit that you do what the fuck does it mean."
You huffed and he chuckled.

"You'll find out soon enough."

Confusion lingered and hatred fled for you were both loosening up but kept eyes ahead, you wanted to speak but your trust kept you at bay for maybe one night would show you the way.