StarChaser// Jegulus||✔️

Regulus

TW: slight mentions of self harm

I'm in a cold room at a long dining table filled with Death Eaters, headed by the Dark Lord.
The cold air in the room is causing goosebumps to rise on my skin, I refuse to even so much as shiver, the slightest move would be noticeable to anyone, and the last thing I want to do right now is to be noticed in this meeting.
I don't even want to be in this meeting.
Someone is talking, I don't know who, I refuse to look around to see. I keep my gaze firmly on the black marble table.
But then I feel the Dark Lord's attention shift, I feel his eyes in my direction and I snap my head up.
Then the Dark Lord speaks and it takes everything in me not to recoil at the sound of his horrid voice.
"You have another son, Orion?" The Dark Lord asks coldly, he sounds almost serpent-like. His voice is chilling, as though I've been dunked in ice
"Not at all, My Lord, Sirius has been disowned the moment he ran from the family. He disgraced us, we do not speak of him" My Father sounds like a scared school boy being reprimanded, I can hear the slight tremble in his voice as he tries ever so desperately to defend himself. The Dark Lord turns his attention on me "You knew of this?" He asks
"He is my brother" I reply fruitlessly
"Crucio" The Dark Lord shouts, aiming his wand at me. I feel the pain surge through my body and I feel him invade my mind using legillimency as he tortures me. He sees the memories of Sirius, of James, of Arlo and he curses me once more. My screams echo throughout the room as the pain wrenches through me
"TRAITOR" The Dark Lord bellows as he fires curse after curse at me, torturing me relentlessly
I'm shaken awake by Evan and Barty who look absolutely distraught
I sit bolt right up and stare bewildered at the two of them.
It was a dream.
Just a dream.
"You were screaming" Evan states
"We thought you were having some kind of fit" Barty adds
"Bad dream" I croak. My throat has gone hoarse. I pick up my glass of water from my bedside table and gulp it down. I set down the glass and my hand tremors, the way it always does after I've been crucio'd. Except this time I hadn't actually been, the dream was just very vivid.
"Right, well, you've woken us all up bang on time for breakfast so get dressed" Evan states wearily.
Something tells me it took them a while to get me up.
Shakily I dress myself in my school robes and follow Evan and Barty down to the Great Hall for breakfast.
We reach the Slytherin table and take our usual places: Evan and Barty next to one another, their backs facing the wall, with me sat on the opposite side of them.
I scoop scrambled eggs onto my plate, adding bacon, sausages, fried mushrooms and some baked beans before I lazily tuck in.
Arlo comes and sits down next to me "You're here early" he comments
"Reggie gave us a lovely wake up call" Barty replies with a grin. I kick him under the table "ouch! No need to get violent" he exclaims. I kick him again.
"What are you trying to conceal?" Asks Arlo, he tries to make his tone airy and care free, but I can detect the slight possessiveness to his tone.
"I had a bad dream is all" I say waving him off
"What about?" He asks
"It's nothing, I don't even remember" I lie. Arlo looks at me skeptically but doesn't push any further.
I finish my breakfast and stand up "I best be off, I have things to do" I state, Arlo looks up at me and frowns
"Want me to come?" He asks
"No thanks" I reply, turning and leaving the Great Hall.
I manage to catch Professor McGonnogall in the hallway and I stop her "Professor, I was wondering if you would be able to tell me the password to Dumbledore's office" I ask
"What for, Mr Black?" Asks Professor McGonnogall
"I need to discuss something with him" I reply
"Is this not something that can be discussed with your head of house?" Asks McGonnogall
"Unfortunately not, Professor" I reply.
She eyes me for a moment before nodding "Very well, I'll escort you up there and check to see if he's free" Professor McGonnogall concedes. I nod and follow her up.
We reach the staircase that leads to Dumbledore's office within minutes. "You wait here, Mr Black" Professor McGonnogall prefaces. I nod and wait patiently as she says the word "lemon drops" and ascends the staircase.
Minutes later she returns "Up you come, Mr Black" Peofessor McGonnogall states, beckoning me up the staircase, I oblige, ascending the stairs, following Professor McGonnogall up to Professor Dumbledore's office.
When we get to the great oak door, Professor McGonnogall knocks three times, bids me goodbye and leaves. The door opens and I'm met with a smiling Professor Dumbledore.
"Regulus Black" he states "to what do I owe this pleasure?" He asks, beckoning me in. I walk inside the grand office, closing the door behind me.
Dumbledore takes a seat in his comfy looking arm chair behind his desk, he gestures to a chair opposite the one he's sitting in "please, take a seat" he states. I nod and sit down in the small desk chair.
"Professor, I have something to ask of you" I preface
"What can I do for you?" He asks, his smile never faltering, his calm tone ever consistent.
"I'm not sure if you're aware, but I've recently joined the Death Eaters" I say, my stomach churning at the admission.
"I am aware" he replies indifferently
"Well, the Dark Lord has asked me to spy on the Order"
"He has?"
"He has also asked Arlo Reins the very same"
"How did you two manage to acquire such a mission?"
"We were tasked with delivering information from Hogwarts. I offered very vague information, we both did. I think I was tasked to prove the loyalty of the Black family"
"Indeed. What would you like me to do with this information?"
"I want to become a double agent. I want to spy for the Order"
Dumbledore raises his eyebrows in surprise, that had obviously taken him off guard. "You do?" He asks
"I never wanted to be a Death Eater, I believe this is my way to contribute to the right side, it can give the Order an upper hand in the war" I reply
"What would you like in exchange?" He asks
"I just want some protection- training really. I've become quite good at occlumency, but not good enough to match against a talented legillemens like the Dark Lord, I have no doubt he will want to use legillimency to ensure I am telling him the truth. I need to learn how to fake and alter memories, how to hide memories. I need your help"
"Well, your protection had already been ensured, Mr Potter had already asked me to protect you. As for your occlumency lessons, I will be happy to provide them. Would you be able to come here every Monday night at 9pm?"
James had asked Dumbledore to protect me? My heart flutters at the thought. "Yes, Monday is fine. Professor" I say, Dumbledore nods in acknowledgement "What do you mean Mr Potter asked you to protect me?" I ask
"Ah yes, Mr Potter approached me after the Order meeting over the Christmas period and told me of your situation, he asked me to help you, to protect you, I told him I'd do what I can" Dumbledore replies, he then smiles at me "It seems Mr Potter cares very deeply about you, he is someone you do not want to let go of in your life" Dumbledore adds
I smile and I nod.
"How exactly do you plan on being a double agent whilst also maintaining your facade of being a spy?" Asks Dumbledore
"Well, I plan on informing the Order of the true ongoings of the Death Eater meetings. The Dark Lord expects an immediate report, so I will need you to tell me what to feed to him before I call him, that's where I'll need to be prepared with occlumency, I have no doubt he'll need his own proof" I explain. Dumbledore nods along as I speak and is silent for a moment.
"Well that seems plausible enough. Your occlumency lessons will start on Monday" Dumbledore replies. I nod.
"Very well, thank you, Professor" I state, standing up and turning to go.
"Mr Black" Professor Dumbledore states, causing me to stop and turn back to face him "Yes, Professor?" I ask
"Help will always be given at Hogwarts to those who ask for it"
I stand staring at him for a moment before I nod curtly "Thank you, Professor" I finally say before turning and leaving.
James had asked Dumbledore to protect me. Over Christmas. After we had broken up. He went out of his way to ask Dumbledore to make sure I was protected. The thought of it makes my heart ache.
I walk back to my dorm so I can grab my bag with my parchment, quills, ink and textbooks so I can head to my Transfiguration lesson.
"Today, class, we will be transfiguring scorpions into bread knives. For your safety the claws and stingers of the scorpions have been restrained, if need be you are permitted to use 'stupefy' to stun them if by some way they manage to free themselves of their restraints. You are not to stun them for your own amusement" Professor McGonnogall announces to the class after the bell rings, signalling the beginning of first period.
I stare down at the scorpion in front of me.
Professor McGonnogall demonstrates to us how we turn a scorpion into a bread knife by doing it herself before she allows us to try it independently.
When she finally lets us have a go, I roll up my sleeves and pull my wand out from my robe pocket.
As I do so I hear a Ravenclaw student audibly gasp and I turn to look at them, only to find they're pointing directly at me. I stare at them, an expression of confusion on my face as I try to decipher what about me has got them so horrified
"What is it, Ophelia?" The girl next to Ophelia asks
"Professor!" She squeaks urgently
"What is it, Miss Dreggs?" Asks Professor McGonnogall
"How could you possibly let someone like that into your classroom?" Asks Ophelia
"Someone like what?" Asks McGonnogall
"He has the mark! My parents told me to be aware of those people with the marks on their arms! They follow him, the one we aren't supposed to talk about!" Exclaims Ophelia
I roughly yank down my sleeves to hide my Mark and I stand up, walking out of the room. I couldn't stand everyone looking at me.
So many people know I'm a Death Eater now, they won't stay quiet, soon everyone will know.
I rush down to my dorm room and as soon as I'm in I shut and lock the door behind me, bashing my fists against it.
I roll up my sleeve and investigate the Mark the way I have hundreds of times. I dig my fingers into my arm and scrape them across my arm.
Not a single scratch.
I keep dragging my nails along the Mark, tears threatening to well in my eyes as the Mark never once falters, never once shows any sign of harm or damage.
I despise it.
I slump down on my bed feeling absolutely defeated.
For once I just want my life to be normal, to be quiet, to not be so...dramatic
Is that too much to ask?

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Hello there my lovelies!

Apologies for the delay I have two essays due on the same way so I was trying (and failing) to be an academic weapon but I am back with an angsty chapter!! Anyways I hope you enjoyed this one! I'll catch you in the next one! Until then, have a great day, lovelies!

Stay wonderful!

All my everlasting love,
Blue<3