StarChaser// Jegulus||✔️

Regulus

TW: Depictions of torture, mentions of vomit, descriptions of fainting/ blackouts

It's 7:00 on a Saturday and I can't sleep.
In an hour and a half I will be meeting with the Dark Lord and I feel sick at the thought of it.
I decide that trying to get back to sleep is fruitless, so I get out of bed.
I slowly and silently get dressed into black denim jeans, a black t-shirt and a black and green checked flannel shirt with some green high top converse. I successfully manage not to wake up Evan and Barty and I leave the dorm room, heading down to the Great Hall to try and stomach some breakfast, but I'm so nervous I don't think that I can.
I keep rehearsing what I want to say to the Dark Lord over and over in my head, that Dumbledore has started Order meetings at Hogwarts and that he's teaching self defence in the hopes that we will have the upper hand for the next battle he plans on commencing.
That should be enough.
I hope.
I haven't told anyone about this meeting, but I want to. Oddly enough, the only person I want to tell is James. He'd know what to say, he'd comfort me. I miss him in that regard.
I miss him in general really.
I push the feeling away as I sit down at the empty Slytherin table. There are only a handful of other students in the Great Hall at this time, I suppose not many people are willing to wake up early on a Saturday, and I don't blame them.
I stare at the breakfast options, but my stomach simply churns and I sigh. I take a handful of grapes and pop one into my mouth. I feel sick at the taste. I abandon my grapes and sigh. I head back to the Slytherin Common Room to grab my coat.
At 7:45 I head out of the castle and down to Hogsmeade.
I get to the Hogshead at 8:15
Fifteen minutes to wait.
Ten minutes go by and I hear a crack that makes me jump. I turn and see the Dark Lord standing in front of me. The sight of him sends a shiver down my spine. I remain stoic, I can't show any sign of weakness, not here, not to him.
"My Lord" I say, dipping my head to him.
"Regulus" He hisses, the sound making my stomach lurch.
"How can I serve you today, My Lord?" I ask, hopefully sounding eager to help.
"I am eager to know the goings on within Hogwarts since my attack in Dartmouth, I trust you heard about that?" Asks The Dark Lord. I nod.
"Of course, My Lord, that was an excellent move if I do say so myself. Word of the attack was spread throughout Hogwarts relatively quickly, actually. Dumbledore addressed it in a speech and had to admit to the school body that there may be a war on the horizon. He started holding Order meetings at Hogwarts. I attended the first one yesterday, Dumbledore plans to spend future Order meetings training us all on self defence with minimal knowledge of offensive spells in the hopes that the Order will have an upper hand on the Death Eaters for the next attack" I explain, trying not to rush despite how nervous I am.
"Excellent" The Dark Lord praises with what I think is a smile. I can't tell. Either way, it sends another shiver down my spine.
"Is there anything else I can do for you My..." But I don't get to finish my question because he invades my mind. It feels like someone is splitting my skull with a pickaxe. I feel like I scream, but I'm not sure, I'm too busy focusing on the Dark Lord in my mind. He sifts through my memories. I conceal some, replacing them with others, but he seems disinterested with my personal memories. He settles on my memory of the Order meeting. He replays the whole meeting, from Dumbledore's introduction to the training session, he watches me practice the 'Depulso' spell intently and he finally leaves the memory, he sifts through my other memories quite quickly. I make sure to conceal ones of James and Arlo, but I especially conceal the memory of my conversation with Dumbledore.
He stumbles upon my memory of Sirius at Christmas and I'm too slow to stop him.
"Crucio" My Father casts relentlessly
Sirius screams again, writhing on the floor "Father, please" Sirius begs, crying as my Father hits him with the cruciatus curse once more
"Take the Mark" Mother demands, her face stoic as she watches her eldest son be tortured
"Never!" Sirius cries as he writhes on the floor
I finally manage to break free of the freezing curse my Mother has me under as she loses her concentration on me. I rush to the fireplace. I grab a big handful of floo powder and throw it onto the fireplace, the flames turn green.
I run in front of my Father "Sirius, go" I state before my Father hits me with the cruciatus curse. The pain surges through me, licking at every nerve, relentless, unforgiving. I fall to the floor, my screams filling the room. I manage to turn my head, I watch Sirius stumble in to the fireplace, mutter "Potters" before the flames consume him and he disappears, leaving me to endure the rest of my punishment.
The Dark Lord finally removes himself from my memory and as he does I feel removed from reality. I feel dizzy.
"I understand now, the lengths your parents went to, to try and recruit your brother, tell me, why did you help him escape?" Asks the Dark Lord
"I was worried for my brother's safety, and I knew he would never give in, however, I knew that my parents' efforts weren't fruitless because I knew that I would be recruited. I was naive then, unfortunately, I wasn't able to see the good of the cause at first, I resisted to begin with, but I soon saw the good of your cause, My Lord, and now I am eager to serve" I lie, trying my hardest to keep my composure, but I feel as though I could keel over at any given moment. I feel more nauseous than I did this morning, I feel light headed, like I may faint. I just have to keep my composure for a little while longer.
"I se, well, you are proving to be an excellent follower of mine, I am pleased with this report and I expect more after future Order meetings" The Dark Lord states
"Thank you, My Lord, of course, My Lord" I reply, feeling as though I could vomit with every word.
"That is all" The Dark Lord states. Before I can say anything he disappears.
I turn and make my way back to the castle. Stumbling with every step. I fear I might not make it up there but I push through, hoping I can make it at least to the entrance hall before I pass out.
I manage to make it through the entrance hall, but my vision is blurring and my legs are beginning to give out.
"Hey, Reg" someone says, it may have been Sirius, but it sounded a bit like James. I can't tell. I don't get a chance to confirm who it is before I hit the floor and black out.
I wake up in the hospital wing, feeling disoriented.
"What am I doing here?" I rasp, my voice feeling awfully dry
"Reg? Thank fuck you're up, I'll go get Sirius" James says, standing up. I grab his arm, stopping him.
"Wait" I say, he looks over at me and lowers himself back down in his chair, holding my hand
"What's up?" He asks softly
"Can I have some water?" I ask
"Of course" James replies, leaning over and grabbing a cup from the night stand, passing it to me. I drink some and instantly feel refreshed, which makes me feel better.
"Reg, what happened?" James asks
I sigh "I'm not supposed to tell you" I reply
"I understand. You can if you want to, I promise I won't say anything. I'm just worried about you" James says
"How long was I out?" I ask
"A few hours" He replies
"Have you been here the whole time?" I ask
"Pretty much"
"Where's Sirius?"
"He had a Saturday detention, but I promised I'd tell him when you woke up"
"Thank you for staying"
"Of course" James smiles at me. The smile pulls at my heart strings and I have the urge to kiss him. But I don't
"I'm going to get Sirius" James says and I nod as he stands up and leaves.
Moments later, Professor Dumbledore opens the curtains around my bed and takes the seat James was sat in before.
"How did the meeting go?" Asks Dumbledore.
"It went well" I reply
"Did you have to use the skills we had been working on?" Asks Dumbledore
"No, not yet, my information was satisfactory enough" I reply
"Good. I assume it was the legillimency that did this to you?" Asks Dumbledore and I nod
"It was brutal, painful" I reply
"I suspect it was because he was being forceful. He doesn't strike me as the best legillimens, but I also suppose the pain is part of the fun for him" Dumbledore states and I simply nod, not sure what else to say
"Did he tell you any of his plans?" Asks Dumbledore. I shake my head.
"He moreso wanted the satisfaction of knowing his attack was being talked about" I reply and Dumbledore nods "Yes I suppose he would" Dumbledore states thoughtfully.
"Reggie" Sirius says, bursting through the curtain but stopping immediately when he sees Dumbledore. "Oh, Professor Dumbledore, Sir, I didn't realise you were here, my apologies" Sirius says
"Not a worry, Mr Black, I was just leaving" Dumbledore states with a smile, standing up, turning his attention to me "Get well soon, Regulus" Dumbledore states before leaving the hospital wing.
"What was that about?" Asks Sirius
"He was getting...information" I reply
"He couldn't have waited?" Asks Sirius
"It's fine, really" I reply
"No, it's not, you blacked out in the entrance hall, you need to rest, not to be interrogated" Sirius argues, almost angrily "wait a minute" he adds before he leaves.
He returns minutes later with a steel bowl and a rag. He dips the rag in the bowl, which I assume is filled with water and he wrings it out. He places the steel bowl down onto the chair and walks over to my bed. "Shift over" says Sirius. I do as he says, but I'm confused.
He gets into my hospital bed, sitting down at my side next to me. "What are you doing?" I ask as he places the rag on my forehead which actually feels really nice.
"Remember when you were little and you used to show up at the foot of my bed in the middle of the night after you'd been sick? You'd jump into my bed and I'd sneak to the bathroom, wet a flannel and come back into the room, holding the flannel to your head and rubbing your back until you fell asleep, well I thought that I'd use old tactics" Sirius explains with a smile.
"You don't have to, I'm sure you have better ways to spend your Saturdays" I reply
"Hey, Reg, you're my little brother, let me spend time taking care of you, I never get to do it anymore" Sirius says seriously.
I sigh and look up at him before slowly nodding "Okay, fine" I reply, unable to help a smile seep through. He shifts me onto my side and begins to rub my back, the way he used to when I was younger and low and behold it does still work the way it used to. I begin to feel sleepy again. "I have all day, Reg, don't worry about falling asleep, you need the rest" Sirius says softly, and I'm glad he confirms that for me because my eyelids droop and I drift off to sleep.

________________________________________

Hello there my loves!

I know it's been a hot minute but I'm back with an angsty chapter BUT there is some wholesome sibling love in there so I hope that makes up for the angst. ALSO!! We're on chapter 50!! We've come so far and we still have a while to go! I didn't expect it to be but this is going to be a LONG fic. Anyway, I hope you enjoyed this one! I'll catch you in the next one! Until then, have a great day!

Stay wonderful

All my everlasting love,
Blue <3