𝐖𝐎𝐒𝐎 𝐗 𝐑𝐄𝐀𝐃𝐄𝐑 𝐏𝐓.𝟐

I know what you're going through. (Alessia Russo)

Warnings: Insecurities, self image/body issues

If this topic in some way triggers you or makes you uncomfortable, please stop reading.

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Alessia had asked you to be her girlfriend the day of your birthday party, in your eyes it was the best gift she could've given you. It was when everyone had left that she had you all to herself when it happened. Alessia always made you feel loved, even if it was the smallest things she did. Like give you a kiss every morning, make you breakfast, help you relax when you're stressed. Your favorite was whenever she would travel for football she would always bring you back something from where she stayed at.

That was the only reason why you liked it when she traveled, other than that it was hell being home without your girlfriend. You knew she was a professional football player, you had no problem with it. But it was pretty draining at home without her when she would get really busy. You had turned to food as a coping mechanism, you eventually took it a bit too far. You didn't like seeing yourself like this so you started going to the gym about 4 times a week. 

You saw some results after doing that for 1 month, but you could still see stuff you didn't like. Around your hips, the way your thighs touched, under your arms. Obviously it was going to take longer than a month for you to see better results but you couldn't stand to look at yourself. You continued to work out but you wore baggy clothes most of the time so you could save yourself the mental breakdowns.

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Alessia had invited you to spain, she had planned this whole trip out. She got both of you a nice airbnb with a pool right in the back. You didn't think she'd want to get in the pool, the beach was fine since you could just wear a baggy shirt and the water wasn't as clear as it was in the pool. 

"Baby guess what i got us.." alessia said as you walked into the bedroom. "What is it?" you didn't know what to expect. "Look.." alessia said holding up two pairs of swimsuits. Alessia handed you your pair and you looked at it carefully. It was a bikini. It was white and had little kissy lips on it. It was cute, you knew it would look cute on her but you weren't so sure about yourself.

"Uhm.." you said. "Go in the bathroom and try it on please.." alessia smiled at you. "Then we can go in the pool." she said sounding so amused. You didn't want to let your girlfriend down and let her have fun alone on the trip she planned for both of you. "Um okay.." you said walking towards the bathroom. You walked in and closed the door behind you. As you got undressed, you could see your body in the mirror, it felt like torture for your brain. You quickly put the bikini on and looked at yourself in the mirror. You didn't like it one bit. What was alessia gonna say if you told her you'd rather not wear it. It wasn't even the bikini, it was your body.

"Babe, are you done? Come out i wanna see.." you heard alessia say from behind the bathroom door. You didn't respond, instead you walked over and opened the door looking at alessia's blue eyes. She could tell something was wrong.

"Hey.." alessia walked in the bathroom and closed the door behind her. "What's wrong baby.." alessia said so softly. You couldn't tell her, you would break to tears before you even got to finish the sentence. You could only put your hands on your hips and grab onto the extra skin. "Y/n..." alessia brought you into a hug, she held you so close. "I know what you're going through." alessia whispered next to your ear. "It's gonna be okay baby...i wish you would've told me sooner." alessia said.

"I couldn't..." you said wiping a tear away. "You can tell me anything y/n, i want you to know that.." alessia pulled away and looked at you. Her eyes scanned your body, that was not helping one bit. "God, you're so beautiful...you're perfect." alessia cupped your face and made you look at her. "You don't have to wear it...but you look really good to me baby..." alessia said.

"I love you.." you said looking up at alessia. "I love you too." alessia said. "I'm gonna wear it for you..." you said.

"You don't have to-" alessia said.

"I want to...you make me feel loved in many ways, i'm sorry i didn't tell you." you apologized.

"Don't be sorry, something like this....it can be hard, but we can get through it together." alessia kissed your forehead.

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A/N: Y'all i'm so nervous for the arsenal vs chelsea matchhhh