girl from the train (gxg)

chapter forty one

alexandra's pov:

i left the doctors office so happy. i got x-rays done and the doctor decided it would be okay to take off my cast. he gave me a split to continue to wear in the meantime but i was finally able to take it off and shower. once i got the cast removed my arm was all skinny and wrinkly. my mom went inside with me. she asked a lot of questions for me and wrote things down to help me make sure i didn't forget the doctors orders.

when we got back in the car, it had been a little awkward. we barely talked throughout the appointment but it wasn't uncomfortable.

"how is your arm feeling?" she asks while turning the car on.

"a lot better. i was starting to get tired of the stupid cast." i laugh.

"i bet. now you can actually shower normally." she laughed too.

she started driving towards my house until we passed by my favorite ice cream shop. she turn and looks at me.

"you want some ice cream?" she asks softly.

"yeah sure." i smiled.

she turned the car around and we went to the ice cream shop. it was raining still but we didn't seem to care. she parked in front of it and we both ran out of the car trying our best not to get too wet.

as we stepped inside, the older man who runs the place greeted us. "what can i get you guys today?" he asked politely.

"can i get a scoop of strawberry ice cream in a cone and a scoop of rocky road in a cone as well?" my mom asks the man. she turns and looks frowns. "wait. i'm sorry i didn't even ask you if that's what you wanted. i remembered your favorite when you were little was strawberry." she says panicking.

"that's okay mom. it's still my favorite." i smiled.

i can feel her let go a sigh of relief. the old man handed us our cone before she paid. we sat down at a little table to eat our ice cream.

"thank you for taking me and for the ice cream. i really appreciate it." i said.

"you're welcome mija. it's the least i could do. i want you to really know that i meant everything i've told you. i realize my mistakes and if i could go back and change things, i would. i know i can't so i'm trying to make things different now. i realize how hard it must have been for you and i couldn't possibly imagine what that was like. i feel so guilty and i think i always will. i completely understand if you don't forgive me but i want to keep trying to be there for you. i wanna be in your life."

"you're 19 now. you're an adult. you have the right to make your own decisions and if me not being in your life is one of them, i can't be mad at you. my decisions made you come to that point and that is only on me. i hope that you slowly let me become part of your life again because i truly want to be there for you. i didn't want to tell you this earlier in case things didn't work out but it seems that i am going to be moving closer to here. instead of hours it will only be about 40 minutes away at most." she says reaching and grabbing my hand.

"i love you so much mi vida and i am so proud of the young woman you have become. you keep inspiring me and i am so excited for you and your future. like i said before, i understand you may never forgive me, but i'm willing to do whatever it takes to build our relationship again. i promise i will never make that mistake again." she looks into my eyes and lets a tear fall down her cheek.

i take her hand in mine and let my own tears fall down.

"i missed you so much mami. you're right, i'm not sure if i could forgive you right now, but i'm willing to try again. i don't want my kids one day to not know who you are. i think we can take things slowly but i still want you in my life." i cried.