Seeing You - Boys of Tommen

Summer in Dublin

August 27th, 2003

Katie:

I wasn't completely lying when I told Hugh that the fight didn't have anything to do with me staying with my Mam in Dublin, for the summer. I barely saw her anymore and she had been pushing me to come for the last two years.

Last summer, I chose to stay in Cork for Hugh, and this summer I chose to go to Dublin, for me. I love Hugh but we needed some time, and I didn't know to say that to him, so I lied, well half lied, maybe a little more than half.

My Mam was much more observant than my Da, so I had been eating regularly and felt stronger and healthier.

Hugh, kept his word and called me every night, sometimes we only talked for a few minutes but other times we stayed up for hours. 

He told me about how difficult it was with his father being so distant, and how he knew that he felt responsible for Gibsie's dad and sister's deaths. I loved that he was opening up to me, he often felt closed off which I guess could be in part due to his Dad. He never mentioned Lizzie, and I didn't bring her up.

Hugh asked me questions about myself too, what I had planned for the future, what my past was like, and other things like that. One night he threw me off when he asked me who my favourite parent was. I thought it was an odd question to ask someone. I told him, how I prefer living with my Da, but I love them equally and I think it made him feel better about favouring his Mam, while still having love for his father.

Dublin had been good for me, my Mam was at work for most of the day, so I walked around the city by myself and it felt good to be on my own. Which was completely the opposite of how I am in Cork, but there's something about the anonymity of the crowd. The bustling city, has so many people with their own lives and it makes me feel small, but in a good way. 

In Cork, at Tommen I felt like I was always being perceived and observed, but in Dublin I could be myself. "You know, how when you asked me last week what I wanted my future to look like?"

"Yes."

"And I told you I had no idea."

"I do"

"Well.... I want to live in Dublin."

"Really?"

"Really." I wasn't usually a definitive person, but something about the city gave me confidence and it felt like I was bathing in the sunlight.

"Dublin?"

"Dublin."

That was last week, and today my Mam's driving me back to Cork, and as much as I'm excited to see Hugh and Aoife, and the others, I find myself looking in the rearview window longingly. 

"Don't want to leave do ya?" My Mam asked, drawing me out of my thoughts.

"No, I'm looking forward to being back, it's just... I really love Dublin."

"I felt the same way about it, the city just always called to me, when your father and I separated the only thing that got me through, was the promise of moving to Dublin, to call this place my home."

"Oh."

When I finally made it to my house, my Da was waiting along with Hugh, Patrick, and Aoife with a cake and a 'Welcome Home' poster." My Mam just dropped me off, not wanting to engage with my father.

"Welcome home Katie." Aoife and Hugh say at the same time, and much to Hugh's dismay she got the first hug. After a solid minute of squeezing, she lets me go to Hugh. We hug for a long time, we don't kiss though, due to my Da standing right there. 

"I missed ya like crazy." Hugh said and I really believed him.

We walk back into the house, Patrick and I are the last ones to be outside, "Thanks for coming Patrick."

"Welcome back, Katie Kat."

Thanks for reading! - H <3