Minute

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It's been a minute since I've picked up this pen
Opened this app
Thought this was again

It's been a minutes since I've let myself feel
Process
And write

It's been a minute since I've wanted to share
Post
Create
What's been going on in my mind

It's been a minute
But yet again
This is the only way I know how to express
Understand
Work through
These emotions
Thoughts
Feelings
Events
Swirling around
Scattered

It's been a minute
But you made me come here
Let me open up
Show me what truly care is

It's been a minute and yet
It seems natural
Fitting

I don't know what to call these feelings
Obsessions
Transference
A desperate grasp of affectation wherever I can get it
Nothing quite sticks
Feel right
Wears this suit and tie

But you single out in my mind
You've rewired my brain
Shown me what a true man should be

When I was at one of the lowest
Needing someone to tell me it would be ok
There you were

With a comforting voice
With a soft smile
With a warm hug

When I felt there was no escape
You fought for me
Beside me
Checked in on me

When I felt it was my fault
You took the blame
Sheltered me
Made me stronger

When I felt wronged
Apologized
For something that wasn't your fault
You didn't do

When I was nervous
You looked me in the eyes
Gave me a minute
Told me
"You can do this, I know you can"
"I believe in you"

I laugh and joke
Exaggerate
What I think about you to my friends
But in truth

You've changed me
You've been there in a way only you could
You've shaped the way I want support
You've redefined my standards

I cannot thank you enough
I could lay down my life
Give you everything
And yet
I feel as though it couldn't ever be enough

So I will write on this paper
Write these words to this void
To these stangers

It's been a minute since I've felt this way
If I ever have

It's been a minute since I knew what true support is
Yet now it's clear as day

It's been a minute since I've held this pen
But for you
Or should I say
Because of you
I have
Because of you I have found this passion once more

It's been a minute but...

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