Forbidden Love

chapter forty six

dedicated to @sphe18 for always leaving such sweet and lovely comments <3

A loud knock on the door woke me up suddenly. I collided my head against my lamp on the side table, causing it to crash. I cursed under my breath before getting up, feeling a bit dizzy. I blinked repeatedly and saw my windows covered in a white blanket. It must've snowed again. Just then someone began knocking again, very impatiently this time. 

"I'm coming!" I half-yelled half-mumbled.

I grumpily yanked open my door and faced Tobias covered in snow. A gasp escaped my lips as I stared at him, surprised to be seeing him here. It's been a week since I've seen him, one long week. I almost forget how he looked. I missed his scars and his bright hazel eyes that always stared into my dull brown ones. I missed his witty yet comforting remarks. I simply missed him.

"What are you doing here?" I asked, dumbfounded, rubbing my eyes. He ran a hand through his hair and pushed passed me as he walked into my apartment.

"Hey!" I yelled, feeling fully awake now. "You can't just barge in here whenever you feel like it!"

Tobias turned around and I finally got a good look at him. There were deep circles under his eyes. I could tell his illness was taking a toll on him now. That or he hadn't slept in days. No visible bruisings or cuts were displayed on his face, which was a first, although there seemed to be a bruise recovering on his left face. Could that have been what Julian did to him? What the hell has gotten into him?

"I can't sleep," he confessed. "I can't fucking sleep and it's because of you."

"Me?" I scuffed, glaring at him. "I'm not the one who cheated on you!"

"Reign, stop being so obtuse," he replied. "I was wrong and I know it. I already apologize repeatedly about it and-"

"That doesn't make it okay!" I yelled back. "You really hurt me Tobias. More than you could ever know."

Tobias walked closer to me and I stepped back, making sure to keep a good distance between us.

"I was scared," he confessed. "I was scared for my feelings about you. I never felt this way about someone before, ever. Boxing means the world to me but doesn't even began to explain a fraction of how I feel about you."

I shook my head and pushed him back. "Stop, I don't want to hear this."

Tobias let out a dry laugh. "I'm already dying Reign, I have nothing to lose. Nothing's stopping me now. I need to tell you how I really feel about you or I wouldn't be able to live with myself. How could I knowing that I've broken your precious heart when my intentions were to only love you to my fullest?"

I heard blood rush through my ears as I stood very still. I didn't need a reminder of the condition he was in. He lied to me about me about multiple things. How was I to know that he was telling the truth this time?

I opened my apartment door and leaned against the door for support. "I think you should leave Tobias."

Tobias lips formed a straight line as he glared at me. "You're kicking me out, for what? Coming here you to tell you that I love you? I got your message Reign. You can't tell me that you don't feel the same way."

I sucked in a breath of air. It felt like he cut open my chest and was trying to find my heart. It was almost as if he wanted me to care about him again. If I was being completely honest I never stopped caring about him.

Tobias came next to me and grabbed the door, making me let go reluctantly. He gently shut it in front us both before taking a deep breath. I felt him pinch his nose as he looked down before turning around. His eyes looked softer now. They no longer looked angry.