To Make You Fall In Love (Phan)

Chapter 11

I'm sitting at home, staring at my phone screen. Should I text him? Or not? I really want to know if he's okay. Or if he's got a boyfriend. Or a girlfriend. I mean that seems the only logical explanation. Guess that just proves he doesn't like me. I shouldn't text him then I'll just annoy him and probably ruin the friendship we have. But then maybe he doesn't have a girlfriend or boyfriend maybe he was just visiting family. All these possibilities and maybes. Ugh.

'Hey. You okay?' It was simple. Short. Just send it. Yet my fingers wouldn't listen. This is so infuriating. This constant battling with myself and my head and my heart and my feelings and I really needed it to stop. Only one way to do that I guess, all or nothing. Just throw it all out there and if it works out, great. If it doesn't...i guess I'll cross that bridge when I get to it. I click send. I almost immediately regret it but what's done is done. I stare anxiously at my phone before deciding I'm being stupid and it could be hours before Phil replies so I get off my bed and go downstairs to make myself a cup of tea. That always calms me down.

I walk back to my room sipping my tea and for once it doesn't have it usual calming affect. I walk back into my room and switch the telly on and settle into my bed and check my phone.

1 new message. Phil Lester.

I open it slowly.

'Yeah. I'm okay thanks. Sorry for rushing off like that :)'

'It's fine. Just wanted to make sure nothing terrible and life threatening had happened and you weren't lying buried in some army marsh land, because you never know, ;)'

'Well, I'm sure you would have to be pretty stupid to let that happen. Seriously how dumb can you get?'

'I know. That's kind of impressive, I guess'

'Definitely impressive ;)'

We talk for a little while longer and I smile the whole time and my heart flutters each time my phone vibrates. It's so easy to talk to Phil. He's kind and sympathetic and funny. And really just so amazing. But the constant nagging thought that he probably only thinks of me as a friend holds a dark veil over all my thoughts. As I'm watching some new anime show waiting for Phil to reply my phone rings. PJ.

"Hey," I say picking it up, "going to  tell me whatever your next crazy plan is?"

"Yep. Meet me on Phils road. Like...now," PJ says quickly.

"Why are you by Phils house?" I ask warily.

"I'll explain everything when you get here,"

"Are you going to burgle his house or something? Because if this is dangerous or illegal I'm definitely not coming,"

"It's not illegal!" PJ says with exasperation "at least I don't think it is,"

"PJ!" I scold frowning. He really is crazy sometimes.

"At least if you come along you can make sure I stay in line and don't end up killing anyone?" PJ sounds hopeful and he doesn't have a point.

"Ugh. Okay fine. I'll come. Give me ten minutes,"

"Five," PJ says and I sigh.

"Alright. Whatever. See you in a bit," and I hang up. I'll go along once and make sure PJ doesn't do anything too crazy and then I'll just tell him to stop with the plans. Simple.

I pull on a jumper and shoes and grab my keys and leave the house to head for Phil's. When I get to the edge of Phil's road I catch sight of PJ's car and start walking towards it. When I look inside I see PJ wearing all black including sunglasses slouching low in his seat. I knock on his window and he jumps in surprise. He quickly unlocks the door and I hop in.

"What the hell are you doing?" I ask.

"Hiding. Spying. You had questions. We're getting answers," PJ says pulling me down so I'm slouching in my chair as well unseen by passers by.

"What? No. That's a serious invasion of privacy," PJ scoffs.

"Come on Dan. Live a little. You're never going to be happy if you hide from what you want, too afraid to go after it. It's time to get your little butt off your bed and get it outside, into the real world. Let it find opportunities. Embrace life. Like YOLO and all the shiz...yeah," he trails off.

"Did you just use my butt as a metaphor in a somewhat dramatic speech?" I say incredulously. And PJ looks at me.

"That's what your response is?" He rolls his eyes, "I was quite proud of that little impromptu monologue. I was expecting a clap or congratulations but no you have to go and question my methods and involvement of your behind," I raise my eyebrows at him.

"I really do worry about you sometimes," I say frowning.

"And I, you, Young Daniel. So let's just worry about each other in unison whilst equally worrying about your love life and trailing your boyfriend? Yeah?"

"There's no way I'm following Phil! And he's not my boyfriend,"

"Not yet. And wasn't it you who told me to grab life by the titballs, I believe it was last year? And to not be a wuss? So stop being a wuss and let's go,"

"I hate you. I hate you. I hate you," I said as PJ broke into a wide grin.

"He should be leaving any time soon, I figured out he usually leaves the house each night at around this time for a few hours. Lets find out where he's going shall we?" I sigh.

"This is crazy," suddenly something moves in the back seat of PJs car and I look behind me and almost scream at the sight of Chris lying down, face up on the back seats of PJs car. "How long have you been there?" I say startled, my heart beating fast at the shock.

"As long as PJ has. I was bored. He invited me along," Chris says bored.

"You could've mentioned you were there before you know giving me a heart attack,"

"Sorry mate, it was quite funny though," Chris says.

"I hate you both,"

"Good to know," PJ says. "Now, you ready to go? Phil just drove past.

"Ready as I'll ever be, I guess," and I sigh knowing how wrong this is but at the same time I really did want to know what's going  with Phil.