Everyone has a dark secret, something they keep buried, hidden away from view. Something that gnaws away at them, messes up their head and eats their happiness from the inside. Nobody likes this fact but they all know it’s true.
Some days have disaster written all over them from the very second you open your eyes. And no matter how hard you try to rub that disaster away it’ll stay there, because it’s poison and stains through the whole day. Worst part is that you know you’re going to have a terrible day and yet you can’t do anything about it.
Since shae left i’d missed her, even though I knew she’d be back, sooner than I even knew. Instead of the things I normally did I threw myself into working on my car, spending my days covered in grease and smelling like petrol.
Staying positive was the hard part, but everytime I had a bad day I would ring shae, and she’d tell me the same thing. “you have to grab life’s technicolour moments, squeeze every drop of happiness out of them, because no matter what life will always have black and white times, but they make the technicolour ones something magical”
If you think about it this is a very true statement, I couldn’t always be happy, nobody can.
But for now, it was a black and white moment, just past 6 in the morning and I was not only awake but full of energy. Apprently running is supposed to help, although i’ve never really seen how. That’s how I found myself pulling on my loosest skinnies and a pair of vans, plugging ear phones in my ears and just letting go.
The sky was still dotted with the last few stars, twinkling lightly. Nobody around my street was awake, it was just getting light and I was all alone.
I just ran, focusing on putting one shoe in front of the other, trying to keep my breathing even. I ran and ran until the world started to wake up, started moving, came to life. That’s when I went back home, shut the doors and blinds. It was dark, but I was alone. I was just getting out from under the warm spray of the shower when my phone started ringing, I didn’t really want to answer it but I did.
It turned out (awkwardly) to be jumpnow, telling me that we were having a tour meeting today and we talked for about 5 minutes whilst I stood there in nothing but a towel, dripping wet. By the time I’d bothered to get dressed into a tight pair of skinnys, (as far as I was concerned pants were deffinately a useless invention) it was time to go again.
Tour meetings were terribly boring, being on tour was probably worth it but I hated organizing the transport and such so as far as I was concerned my day was over.
But, when I got there a pretty little blur fell into my arms, hugging me tight.
“shae!! I love you so much! Please don’t leave again”
“I don’t plan to”
Then she kissed me, lips tasting of sugar and sunshine. My day was deffinately looking up.
