Drowning- A Conor Maynard Love Story

Chapter 51- The Ending Of A Chapter ||Part 1||

Chapter 51- The Ending Of A Chapter ||Part 1||

"The loss of an important one allows you to learn the true value of life."~ Samirah Zaman

I bite my lip to stop the tears from streaming but it doesn't help. My tears continue to roll down my cheeks. I just cheated on my boyfriend and backstabbed my friend. I take a breath but it comes out as a struggle. I curl up into a foetal position and allow myself to cry. I internally beat myself up for my actions that I have just completed. I felt nothing throughout the whole thing. He didn't make me feel what Conor does. Why did I just cheat on my boyfriend because of my assumptions? A small of me argues that I have all the proof in front of me but I have no actual proof. I'm just assuming.

I raise my head when Jake's voice fills the room. I look up to see him re-entering the room again. He looks at me, concern filling his expression. "Anna, what's wrong?"

How can he ask that? "Are you being serious? I just cheated on him Jake. On our anniversary. How can you ask me what's wrong. I've ruined everything."

"Just don't tell him." He shrugs and anger builds up in me.

"Do you not care?! You just cheated on your girlfriend and it hasn't even been two weeks yet! How can you pretend that everything is okay Jake?!"

He rests his palm on my cheek. I look in his eyes and see them burning with something strong. He smiles timidly at me. He pushes my hair back before speaking in a hushed tone, "Because you were right. This, us, feels so right. So perfect. Like it's meant to be. I love you so much Anna. You will always be number one. No matter who it is you will always be first."

Not wanting to hear any more I push his hand away before jumping off the bed. I turn and face him, "There will never be us Jake-"

"But-"

"Let me finish. I'm sorry for putting you through all this and I'm sorry for hurting you but there will never be an us. I love Conor and Conor only and even if Conor leaves after all this it still won't ever be you. I just don't see you like that and I can never do that to Armani. She loves you Jake! Why throw that away for me? I see how much you like her and one day you will realise that I am just a petty school crush and you will thank me for walking away. Don't throw away something permanent for a temporary position." Without giving him the chance to speak I head towards to the bathroom for a shower.

Once in the bathroom I lock the door and strip myself of the shit I put back on. I slide under the shower and let the hot water glide down the length of my body. Not enjoying the feel of dirt on me I grab my scrubber and scrub my body until I am feeling raw. My body has red patches all over and as I stare at my body I feel nothing but like a dirty whore. Not being able to stop them my tears fall, as does my body to the ground.

Not long later do I step out of the bath. I hear music playing and I recognise it to be In Case by Demi Lovato. Slipping my gown on, I wrap my hair in my towel and leave the bathroom. I grab some casual clothes before heading back to get dressed. When I come back to my room I see Jake sitting on the bed staring at the floor. "Jake you need to leave. Go back to Armani. Tell her the truth and apologise. Tell her that you will no longer speak to me if that's what she wants. Tell her that you will do whatever it takes to make you guys work. Tell her that it was my fault and that she can call and I'll tell her the truth. Go and work things out."