Determination [ COMPLETED ]

Feelings

Okay Listen, some of you guys have been messaging me asking for me to do dirty stuff, in more detail, yall horny mofos. So i this chapter will get pretty dirty. Its going to Happen in the tent. So if you don't want to read that part don't. Its girlxgirl. So yeah its gonna get dirty i just wanted to warn you. Because some of yall horny mofos keep asking. So here ya go. Yall been warned.

[ Chasity ]

Dad opened the back door and then closed it and sat next to me. "Are you okay?" dad asked. "Not even a little." I said. "Why?" he asked putting an arm around me. "I almost killed Emmi. Now you and mom are fighting. Why should i be okay?"

"You know, me and mom aren't fighting. We are still very happy. We were talking about you yes. Your mom wants to put you into a support group, and start therapy. But I didn't want to and i don't. I guess sometimes its hard for me to realize that you aren't okay. So i argued with her. She was crying because i wasn't hearing her." Dad said. "Dad, i know im not some perfect kid. I'm trying to be, its hard when God makes it so difficult. I'm not okay. I never will be, I want to be like you and Colette, but its so hard when you come from some serial killer. I want nothing more to be blood related to you and Colette and my siblings. I want to have your DNA running in me. But i don't i have a serial killer and some random dude who apparently had lots of issues. That's why he is dead." I cried putting my head on dads shoulder. "You know, Your are perfect in your own way. You don't need to be like Mom or Avia, or Gavin, or Emmi or any one. You are you and i love you. You fight for things you believe in, you never leave anyone out, you care so much everyone has good and bad days. You do come from me and mom." Dad supported me. "Thanks, but i hurt Colette, i don't deserve her as a mom. I put her through so much, so much hell. Shes an innocent human who i take for granted. I feel as if she isn't my mother anymore. I feel like she is just some other person I hurt."

"Why do you feel like that?" dad asked. "I know your lying. I love everyone in this family so much. No one loves me as much as i love them. I'm going to shower." I said crying. I stood up and walked in the kitchen and mom was in there. She looked at me and softly smiled. "im sorry. I-i cant." I started to cry and ran to my room."

[ Shay ]

I walked into the kitchen and sat down on the barstools. "What did you guys talk about?" Colette asked. "well to be honest..you... we talked about you." i said. "What? Why? What happened?" Colette asked shocked. "Chasity, feels as if you don't love her. She feels like you look at her at a stranger. She says she hurt you and feels like you aren't her mother." I said. I looked at Colette and she started to tear up. She put her hand on her head and i walked over to her and hugged her. Then she just started to cry. "Its okay, its okay." I said comforting her. "Look its 2, and her party is at 5. Why don't you take her out and talk to her. Let her tell you her feelings. Go take a hike on the mountain path and talk. She is 15 a crazy hormonal teenager girl." I smiled. Colette shook her head yes. She wiped her tears and went to Chasitys room.

[ Chasity ]

I ran to my room and cried. "Chasity, please come out here." Mom said. I rolled my eyes and opened the door, and she had been crying. "Want to go on a walk? and talk?" mom asked weakly. I started to tear up and bit my lip and a few tears escaped. I nodded, i put on shoes and kept breathing in. We went out the backdoor and silently walked up the mountain and when we made it to the top mom layed out a blanket. Then we sat down. "Tell me why you feel you don't deserve me." mom said.

"I cant, ill just hurt you. I don't want to hurt you." She said weakly. "Chasity please. I love you so much. To see you hurting this much hurts me." Mom said. I breathed out. "Fine, i feel like im not enough for you, i screw everything up. Your this person who i look up to so much and your so sweet and kind and i keep hurting you. You don't deserve to hurt. You do nothing but love me and i hate it. I hurt you i don't deserve you. When i do something stupid you do nothing but love me and support me. Since i didn't come from you i feel like i have this higher standard then everyone else."