One True Bond (COMPLETE)

Kajol

I slept for most of the flight, waking up only when the captain told us we were about to land. It felt good finally having a rest, not thinking about anything, not feeling guilty. I rush through arrivals trying not to be noticed by anyone. As I leave the airport to find my car I'm suddenly swarmed by paparazzi. I hold my hand up to try and block the flashes from my eyes but to no avail.
"Kajol why are you back early?"
"Kajol is it true that you've quit the film?"
"Why are you not with your co-star?"
"Kajol are you filming tomorrow?"
"Is it true you have heat exhaustion?"
The questions fly at me like bullets through the air, I try to dodge them when I spot my car and hurry towards it. The driver gets out and opens the back door for me and I dive in away from the flashes of the paps. By the time the driver starts the engine the paparazzi have got a new victim. As we drive past the swarm I catch a glimpse of who they are now torturing. Shah Rukh Khan. Our eyes meet briefly but I turn away my breathe catching in my throat.

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The gates slide open and the driver pulls the car into the driveway. I clamber out as the engine dies down. I slowly walk up the steps to the front door. It feels like this isn't my house, this isn't where I'm supposed to be but deep down I know I'm just being stupid. I twist the door knob and the door opens. I take a step through the door and find Ajay sat on the sofa watching something on TV. When he hears the door close with a click he jumps off the sofa excitedly and runs towards me. I plaster a false smile on my face and try to wipe the look of guilt from my eyes.
"Kads," he practically exclaims as he tries to hug me. I push him away gently breaking his joy. His eyebrows furrow, his smile drops and his eyes become full of concern. "Kajol?"
"I'm fine," I say, a grimace more than a smile on my face. Ajay takes a step backwards half turning his face, his eyes squinting as if trying to work out a maths problem.
"You don't seem it?" He stammers. I feel the blanket of guilt wrap itself around me. I can't deal with Ajay touching me-I feel so dirty. I mean I had another man on my body, a man I shouldn't have been with. In my mind I feel like Ajay might be able to sense him if he touches me and I couldn't deal with the consequences right now.
"I just need to freshen up," I lie, really I just want to be alone, "you know I've been traveling all day."
"Oh yeah sure, you hungry?" The mask of anxiety on Ajay's face slips away and is replaced by a mask of joy. He has no idea.
"No, no I ate on the plane," I mumble and make my way past him towards our bedroom. Neither of us say anything as I shut the bedroom door, separating me and Ajay. I feel tears begin to enter my eyes and don't do anything to stop them. I drop my handbag on the floor with a thump and shuffle towards the bathroom. I turn the switch for the shower, the water jetting out of the square head protruding from the ceiling. I don't even bother to undress, I just step into the stream of water and sit on the floor. The water absorbs into my clothes making me feel heavy, heavier than I already feel. After a few minutes I begin to scrub my skin. I had to get all trace of Shah Rukh Khan off my body before I could let Ajay touch me. I stay like this in the shower for half an hour, scrubbing away the guilt. As I turn the shower off and grab a towel from the rail I hear Ajay rummaging around in the bedroom. I decide to wait until he's either in bed asleep or left the room before I can find my pyjamas. I don't have to wait long, the bedroom door shuts with a bang and I begin to take off my wet jeans and t-shirt hanging them to dry on the door of the shower. I wrap the towel around myself and peek round he bathroom door. The coast is clear so I make my way to the draws on the opposite side of the room. I pull on the top draw and hunt for a pair of long sleeve, long leg pyjamas. When I find the only pair I hastily put them on and towel dry my hair putting it in a pony tail. I hear the patter of Ajay's feet coming towards the bedroom so dive into the bed under the covers, switching off the bedside light just as the door creaks open.
"Kads?" Ajay whispers into the darkness. I scrunch my eyes close and don't reply. Ajay steps into the room and shuts the door as quietly as possible. He feels his way around the bed and pulls the duvet back, sliding underneath. I hold my breath feeling him creep closer. Ajay puts his arm over me and snuggle his head into my neck and wet hair. It takes real effort not to flinch or tense up. My eyes shoot open and I stare at the clock on the bedside table. It reads 4:02. It feels like I've been awake for years not just a day but even seeing the time doesn't make my eyes sleepy. Not even listening to the breathing of Ajay as he sleeps makes me want to join him in his slumber. So I watch the clock as the LED lights flick from minute to minute until it reads 6:30. The alarm screams into life and it feels like I've been waiting for it to break the silence since last year.

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Karan knew I was traveling back to Mumbai yesterday when he landed hours earlier from the voice mail I had left him. He had called back and told me to be on set so we could begin filming some of the scenes for the film and I had agreed to be there. So that's where I am going in my car, not being driven today but driving myself. I just wanted to be in my own space, to be able to think without someone else breathing. I pull into a designated parking spot on the set and step out of the drivers door. I wander around the set for a few minutes unsure of where everyone is. I find them all sat outside in a make-shift cafeteria.
"Kajol," Karan exclaims getting up from his chair and coming over to hug me.
"Karan," I smile as he guides me towards a seat. As I weave my way towards the chair I greet people I know and stop to chat to some of them but I completely avoid Shah Rukh who in return is completely avoiding me. He doesn't even look up from his bottle of water. I slide into my seat when I reach it.
"Kajol," Rani hugs me, "long time no see cousin." I smile at this and lean over to hug her.
"I know we really must stop meeting like this," I joke. For the past couple of films we had worked together so I was delighted when Karan said he had offered Rani the part of Naina.
"So," Rani whispers jerking her head in the direction of Shah Rukh, "what's up with you guys?"
"Nothing," I shake my head snatching a glance at him, still gazing into his water, "you know just not had chance to talk." I regret saying this last bit.
"Why don't we swap seats so you can talk to him then?" Rani suggests getting up out of her seat. I look around, what excuse to use? Suddenly I notice a sign pointing in the direction of the toilets.
"Ah there they are," I say a bit too loudly. The chatter quietens down and even Shah Rukh looks up from his water and...