Prologue

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Dear Roxie,

I know you're probably gonna hate me for this and I am really sorry, but I just couldn't stand it anymore. I couldn't stand hiding myself from the world and I hate being this weak, but maybe I'm just not as strong as you.

You are my best friend and I love you to the moon and back and I hope that you'll forgive me for this. For leaving you this way when I know you need me as much as I need you. I hope you can move on knowing that I did find happiness with you and that you'll remember the good times we've shared.  I am scared, but I know this is the only way. This is the only way I can be myself and not be afraid.

I'm not sure if heaven is for real, but I hope that God forgives me and accepts me. I am so scared and afraid of this choice, but at the end of the day it is my choice. I am ready to gain my wings and fly in freedom. I hope you don't hate me and don't cry, because I am at peace now. I can stop hiding my true self and I am surrounded by love. I will be by people who can accept me as the beautiful and gay man that I am.

I am no longer going to be bullied or harassed and you should be happy for me. I wanted to tell you this, I truly did, but I just knew you were going to talk me out of this. I'm happy now. I just know I'll be.  Don't think of it as suicide, just me choosing to go home my way.

I love you, so much Roxie. Please forgive me.

Love,

Bennie

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