Me Without You

Chapter 3:

Dear Bennie,

You were loved. I loved you so much, it hurts my heart knowing that you're not here anymore. Knowing that I'll never see your face again, hear your laugh or feel your touch anymore breaks my heart and I don't know how much longer I can live like this. I am trying to be strong, but these days are just passing as a blur. School is horrible; lunch was lonely and awkward. A bunch of fake ass people came up to me and apologized about your death, but where were they for your funeral? Where were they when our bullies bothered us? Where were they when you cried your eyes out because we were surrounded by simple minded people? I miss you so much, Bennie and I don't know how to live life anymore without you. I wish I could be with you right now, far away from these monsters. I don't know how much longer I can survive without you, Bennie. I feel so empty because when you left you took a huge part of my heart. I don't know if you can see me from the other side, but always know this; you were loved Bennie.

Roxie

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I threw away my plate and walked out of the quiet cafeteria. I was ready to be home, but I had one more class left. I hated P.E. but it was my last one and I had to have at least three credits to qualify for early dismissal.

It sucked knowing that I wouldn't share this class with Bennie, we always had P.E. together. I felt my lips pull into a smile when I thought about our first day in high school.

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"I hate P.E.," I groaned as we walked to the gym, our book bags slumped over our shoulders. "Yeah, I know me. I hate sweating," he gagged and I smiled. "At least we have this class together, promise me something," I grabbed his hand and he nodded towards me. "Shoot," he said as we opened the doors and stood in line, waiting for the teacher to come. "WE must have P.E. together until we graduate," I looked at him, dead pan serious. "Fine," he pulled me into a hug and kissed my forehead.

"I thought you were gay," I pushed him, "I'm off limits, honey." He laughed at my joke, until some asshole bumped into me and made me drop my books. "You guys are fucking weird," Jessica laughed, "fucking fag and les." "Shut up," I demanded and she rolled her eyes and stood closer to me. "Or what, nerd?" she asked, as her posse laughed.

"You better back off," Bennie stood up for me and I stopped him. "Thanks," I smiled as they strolled off, back to their mean ways elsewhere. "What're friends for," he hugged me, "we have to have each other's back."

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"Roxanne," I heard my name being called and I looked up as our teacher, Mrs. Newton, called out role. "Here," I raised my hand and she smiled at me, a sad one and I forced myself to ignore it. I hated this pity. It was fake, no one not even the teaches helped us.

"IT's a phase. Bullies are everywhere," they all said as Bennie and I faced these monsters alone.

"Ok, this is the syllabus we are going to be following and we're going to be starting physical activities next week, so I'll need you all to have your fees paid for your uniform and lockers," she smiled, walking up and down the line so that everyone could hear her loud and clear.

"Do we have to do these 'physical' activities?" I heard someone ask and Mrs. Newton glared at them. It was one of the popular jocks, Jason; Jessica's twin brother. I groaned and rolled my eyes as she went over everything including the rules I've known all four years.

When the bell rang, I was the first person out of that wretched school and straight to my bus. "Hey!" I heard someone call out and I turned to find a stranger walking toward me, my journal in his hand.