You're My Destiny - discontinued

Chapter 27

“Hello Melbourne! How’s everyone going tonight?” My voice sounds surprisingly confident, despite how I’m feeling inside. After the cheers quieten down I continue to talk. “Let’s jump straight into it! If you know the words feel free to join in. Here we go!”

The music starts playing and immediately takes over my senses. I’ve never been so happy in my life; the stage is always where I’ve always been comfortable on and now here I am, performing for all these people. Music has always been an important factor in my life and I sing as a form of expression. When I was choosing my songs, I tried to think of songs that had nothing to do with what was going on in my mind because then people would be able to see right through me, but I knew that I would never connect to the song if it didn’t mean something to me. So, I am seriously singing my heart and soul out right now.

My hands shakily grasp the microphone, as I stand centre stage with a spot light directly on me. My cue to start singing arrives and I part my mouth as I start to sing my heart out.

(A/N this is Halo-Beyonce. If you read the lyrics of all the songs Beth sings you’ll understand why she chose those songs and will get a better understanding of what she is trying to get across the Harry.)

“Remember those walls I built
Well baby they’re tumbling down………..

It’s like I’ve been awakened
Every rule I had you breaking
It’s the risk that I’m taking
I ain’t never gonna shut you out

Everywhere I'm looking now
I'm surrounded by your embrace
Baby, I can see your halo
You know you're my saving grace
You're everything I need and more
It's written all over your face
Baby, I can feel your halo
Pray it won't fade away……….”

As I reach the higher notes of the song the crowd go wild and cheer me on. I hear many voices from the audience, blending into one voice, singing along to the song and nothing could make me happier.

Once the melody of Halo fades out, the intro for the next song surrounds the arena without delay and I look over to Harry who’s head is sticking out of the curtain - only enough for me to see - grinning like a child on Christmas day. He gives me two thumbs up but I tap my ear to remind him to pay attention to the song and he nods knowingly.

(A/N this is Taking Chances- Celine Dion)

“Don't know much about your life.
Don't know much about your world, but
Don't want to be alone tonight,
On this planet they call earth.

You don't know about my past, and
I don't have a future figured out.
And maybe this is going too fast.
And maybe it's not meant to last,

But what do you say to taking chances,
What do you say to jumping off the edge?
Never knowing if there's solid ground below
Or hand to hold, or hell to pay,
What do you say,
What do you say?...........”

I move on to the next song straight away and during the intro I stare back at Harry and he looks kind of confused but I really hope this next song will clear everything up. I stare at him intently to remind him to listen carefully and I assume he gets my message as he nods and smiles sweetly. The entry of the next song arrives and I hope Harry understands. I’m better at singing my feelings than talking about them.

(A/N this is Catch Me- Demi Lovato. This song portrays what Beth feels perfectly so read the lyrics!)

“Before I fall too fast
Kiss me quick but make it last
So I can see how badly this will hurt me when you say goodbye

Keep it sweet, keep it slow
Let the future pass and don't let go
But tonight I could fall too soon into this beautiful moonlight

[Chorus]
But you're so hypnotizing
You've got me laughing while I sing
You've got me smiling in my sleep
And I can see this unravelling
Your love is where I'm falling
But please don't catch me...

See this heart won't settle down
Like a child running scared from a clown
I'm terrified of what you do
My stomach screams just when I look at you

Run far away, so I can breathe
Even though you're far from suffocating me
I can't set my hopes too high
'Cause every "Hello" ends with a "Goodbye"

[Chorus]

So now you see why I'm scared
I can't open up my heart without a care
But here I go, It's what I feel
And for the first time in my life I know it's real

[Chorus]

If this is love please don't break me
I'm giving up so just catch me”

As I finish the song off, I don’t look back at Harry. I’m too scared of his reaction. I practically just told him that I do, in fact, like him – through song. I mean at least I think I do. I’ve only liked one person before but with Harry it’s so different. Everything I’m feeling is so much more intense and it’s extremely overwhelming. Even though he doesn’t feel the same way, I feel the weight of the world lift of my shoulders as the melody fades off into the distance.

Just knowing that I confessed my feelings, despite the fact that the feeling isn’t mutual, made me feel free. For so long I was so used to bottling up my feelings, even hiding them from even myself, and now that I was letting it all out it felt rejuvenating. Although I’m still afraid of confessing other things, I’m doing much better than a month ago. I’m not sure how it happened, but I think Harry had something to do with it. Just knowing that he believes in me enough to let me be on this stage warms my heart and gives me strength.

“I’d like to dedicate the next couple songs to my mum,” I look up to the roof of the arena, as if trying to look through it and to the dark night sky. “Happy Birthday, I love you and I miss you so much.”

The melody of the song fills my senses as I close my eyes to picture my mum and sing just for her. I really wish she were here now, to see me finally living my dream.

(A/N this is I miss you- Miley Cyrus)

“You used to call me your angel
Said I was sent straight down from heaven
You'd hold me close in your arms

I loved the way you felt so strong
I never wanted you to leave
I wanted you to stay here holding me

[Chorus]
I miss you
I miss your smile
And I still shed a tear
Every once in a while
And even though it's different now
You're still here somehow
My heart won't let you go
And I need you to know
I miss you,
I miss you

You used to call me your dreamer
And now I'm living out my dream
Oh how I wish you could see
Everything that's happening for me
I'm thinking back on the past
It's true that time is flying by too fast

[Chorus]

I know you're in a better place,
But I wish that I could see your face,
I know you're where you need to be
Even though it's not here with me

[Chorus x2]”

I fight the tears back, knowing that I only have a song left. This song is probably the hardest song for me to sing, but most important since it was mum’s favourite. This is the song mum would always sing me to sleep, the song that would always give me hope, the song that will be forever in my heart.

(A/N this is Beautiful-Christina Aguilera)

“…… You are beautiful, no matter what they say
Words can’t bring you down…….”

I drag out the last note and look around to the crowd. I try my hardest to absorb the image and take a mental picture. I never want to forget this moment. Never before have I felt this happy, for as long as I can remember. I can’t believe that I actually did it. I did what my dad told me I would never do, and that was to achieve my dreams.  Would he be proud of me? There’s a part of me that wishes he could be here, so I could show and prove to him that I’m not a failure, I’m not a piece of shit.

Mum, do you see me now? I’m living my dream, I'm keeping my promise.

Once the crowd quietens down I say, “Thank you so much for having me here tonight and being such an amazing crowd. I will never forget this night and I have you guys to thank for being a part of it. I hope you enjoy the rest of the show,” before turning my back to the stage.

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(A/N This didn't have alot of Harry and Beth interaction but the next chapter is going to be very eventful so hold on! Next chapter is definitely going to be long!

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