Secret Love

Trapped

**Harley's pov**

It's been a month since we broke up. Tonight is Christmas Eve. My first Christmas alone. Day in and day out I sit in this cold empty house. I haven't felt this sad and depressed since my parents died. I miss Zak. He was my happy. He was my light at the end of the tunnel. With Him gone my world is dark and cold. He has tried to get a hold of me for weeks now. I think he finally gave up trying. He did me wrong. He probably never really loved me. I've kept myself busy by decorating the whole house. I heard the doorbell ring. Probably Aaron again. He's been checking up on me recently. I answer the door to see Zak. "What do you want?" I ask him bitterly. He just looked at me then back at the ground. "I didn't want you spending Christmas alone." He tells me softly. He was very down. "I don't want to spend it with you." I go to shut the door. "Wait." He catches it. "Harley, please don't be like this. This is the season for forgiving. Please forgive me." "Go away." I tell him upset. A fire burned in me full of anger and hate. "Baby, please I need you." "Oh well." I shut the door in his face and lock it. I go back to the living room and stare at the fire. Man it's cold outside. It snowed here yesterday. I think it's still snowing. I hold my face in my hands not knowing what to do. I sit on the couch until it was bed time. I get up and lock all of my doors. I get to the front door and see a car in my driveway. What in the world? It was still snowing very heavily. It never snows in Vegas. I open the door to see it was Zak in the car. I go out to him to see he was asleep. He must be freezing. My heart dropped out of my chest. I knock on the window waking him up. He jumped and then looked at me. He opened the door. "What the hell are you doing?" I ask him. "I I was ggoing to come see yyou again." he shivers from the cold. I look over in the passenger seat to see Gracie. "Couldn't you turn the heat on?" I cross my arms. "I I turned it off." "Youre going to freeze to death." I tell him upset. "Yeah." he looks down at the ground. "Get your ass inside." I tell him and walk to the front door. What is he thinking? In this weather hes going to get sick and die! Zak follows me in with Gracie at his heels. I get inside and shut the door. I go to the kitchen and fix him some hot chocolate then turn the fire back on. I grab some blankets and throw them at him. "I know you don't want me here, I had to see you and see how you are doing." He tells me as he stares at the fire. "I'm doing fantastic." I tell him rudely as i hand him his hot chocolate. "Thanks, please don't be mad at me." "Excuse me? You did me wrong!! I have every right to be mad!!" "I know , I know. That was a month ago. I miss you, Gracie misses you." "I miss Gracie." I sit down and she comes over to me and jumps all over me licking me. "That's all you miss?" "Yes." I glare at him. He sighs then looks down. He's hurt. I don't care, now he knows how I feel. "Do you even want me here?" "Not really." "Then I'll leave." he sets his hot chocolate down and walks to the door. "Gracie." he calls her. Gracie gets off of me and goes to Zak with her tail between her legs. "Leave her." I yell after him then follow him to the door. I then stand in front of him. "I'm not leaving her here.She's my dog." "You bought her for me." I argue back. "I paid for her." he argues. "She was my gift." "It's my name on her papers." he presses. "Fine!!" I throw my hands up in the air. He opens the door and walks out into the blizzard outside. The snow was flying around in the air unabling me to see. He then gets in the car. The roads are too dangerous. He's not driving on this. He gets in the car and starts it. I run barefoot out to the car and open his door and take the key out of the ignition. I run back inside with him following behind me. We make it inside to the fire. "What are you doing?" he asks me. "You're not driving in this weather." I tell him as I warm my feet up and put his keys in my pocket. "I thought you didn't want me here." he looks into my eyes. "I don't, but i don't want you dead either." "You don't act like it." "Just because I'm mad doesn't mean I want you dead." "Harley, I'm sorry for everything i did and said. I didn't mean any of it. I love you with all of my heart. I want you home." "Zachary, i'm tired of it. I'm tired of all of it. The fighting, the rejection, im tired of not being good enough for you. I'm tired of all the crap." "Harley, it will be diffrent. we are going to get married. I had it all planned out. I tried to ask you but i choked up. Please let our relationship continue. I need you in my life. I'm a wreck with out you." he comes over to me taking my hands. He then stares into my eyes. "I don't want to marry you." I take my hands back. "So that's how it's going to be." he sighs hurt. "Yes, no, I don't know." I sigh. He takes off his jacket and puts it on the rack. I saw he had a major cut on his arm. "What the hell happened?" I take his arm. "I cut myself." he says softly. "ON PURPOSE!?!" "No love, it was an accident." he says ever so calmly. I pull him over to the sink and run hot water. I get the bandage out and go back over to him. I clean his wound as he watches me quietly. I get him all fixed up and look up at him. He was jut starring at me I go to walk away but he caught me in the doorway. "Please forgive me." he whispers softly. I stare at the ground. After all he's done to me he wants me to pretend all of that never happened? He then looks up at the mistletoe."Look." he smiles at me. I've missed his smile. He held his hands around me tightly and leaned down to kiss me. I then felt his lips on mine. My heart instantly started racing. I was shocked then kissed him back. His warm lips felt so good on mine. I began to become madder by the second. He pulled back and looked at me. I raise my hand to slap him but then stopped in my tracks. I can't slap him. He's my father, my ex lover. He looked at my hand then back at me. "Do it, i deserve it. " he sighs. I lower my hand and look at the ground. "I can't." I whisper. "Harley, i know i did you wrong and lost trust in you. please,please forgive me. I'll do anything for you to return home." he tells me. "I don't want to go home." "yes you do." "No! I am home." "You can't live alone." "Watch me, Plus my parents are here." "No they aren't, They are in heaven." he sighs. "I don't want anything to do with you." "You're over reacting. All i did was say hurtful things and take you to the doctor." he says calmly. "All you did was humiliate me, tell me you never loved me, treated me like trash, try to hit me, fire me,and kick me out!!" "I apologized afterwards. like you said i regretted every minute of it." "Just because you apologized makes it okay?" I yell at him. "No, it doesn't, please Harley, make my Christmas wish come true. let me have you for Christmas." "No." I answer. "Harley this is not healthy for us. please sweetheart, we need each other." he takes my hands and stares into my eyes. "I know you've been hurting and missing me as much as I've missed you." "Oh yeah? How do you figure that?" "Aaron." he smiles. "You're the one who keeps sending him to check on me?" "yes, it tears me apart you want nothing to do with me. All the calls , all the messages, and me showing up. You've shut me out. I hate every minute of it." "That's because i want nothing to do with you." "I'm still going to try to win you back." "Not while you're here!! Since we are stuck here you are nothing but a father to me! I don't even want that! I wanted to spend Christmas alone. You kiss me, touch me, or even say anything about me coming back home or trying to get back together with me i will kick you out. I don't care how bad it is outside!" "Harley, don't be like that you won't kick me out." "try me." I get in his face. "Can we please have a nice Christmas try real hard to be nice. That's all i ask. I guess i can be your father while i'm here, just as long as i get to see you and see you happy." he agrees to me. He was truly crushed. "Good." I storm up the stairs. I shut my door and sit on the floor. What am I doing? I need him. I need Zachary back in my life.I kept having that image of his hurt expression pop up in my head. His eyes held true sarrow and pain. The way he carried himself, the frown that forms on the edge of his lips. I change into my pj's then go down the stairs. "Gracie?" I call her as i go down the stairs. I see Zak looking out the window into the cold frosty night. "she's sleeping with me." he tells me softly not turning around. "Since when do you allow her to sleep with you?" "Since you left, She will cry every night." "Let me sleep with her please." I say softly. "Sleep with me then you can." "I can't sleep with my father." "fine, no dog then." he then continues to speak. " I find it funny how you focus on the bad things. After all I've done for you and this is how you repay me. If it wasn't for me you would have been put in an orphanage, wasn't for me you wouldn't have this house, have a dog, go to school, have a car, have nice things, if it wasn't for me you'd still be dead!" he says getting more upset by the minute. He's right after all he's done for me and this is how i treat him. "I'm sorry, you're right, i have been treating you like crap. I just need time. I'm not ready to be in a relationship." I tell him speaking softly. He continues to look out the window. "I'll give you time to think it over." "Can I please sleep with Gracie?" "I've already answered that." "Gracie, come here baby." I call her kindly. She gets up and comes over to me. "What are you doing?" Zak turns around and looks at me upset. I don't answer him and go to the kitchen. I go in my fridge and fix her some food. I set the plate on the ground and sit next to her while she eats. "Has daddy not been feeding you?" I ask her in Spanish. "Would you rather sleep with me? He's probably taken it out on you hasn't he? " Gracie finishes her food so i clean up her plate. I should just sneak her up the stairs. I look over at Zak to see him watching my every move. "Don't."