Raising Daniel

6

The early days had been spent sneaking around, stealing moments where we could. Between her lack of babysitters and my working schedule, it had been difficult. I spent a lot of time out of the country, but the moment my plane landed, I tried to see her. Then there was the fact that she worked for us. We couldn't risk anyone outside the band finding out. But we both wanted this to work. I loved her company. She was funny, witty, and could talk for hours on end without taking a breath. She made me feel complete. The days that I didn't see her, I felt lost. I wanted to ring her and speak to her every chance I could. I was obsessed. She had totally taken over my life.

After a month of dating, she decided to introduce me to her children. Up til then, she had come to my apartment or we had gone for meals, drinks, the cinema. But with her allowing me into her home, it opened up he possibility of not having to use a babysitter anymore. She had no family in London after moving from York to be with her husband, Mark, when she was twenty.

'If it wasn't for me getting my amazing job at the company I would've moved back home when he died. But I like it here, I like London, and Maddie's friends are all here, Lily is settled in nursery. I couldn't disrupt their lives any more.'

She had given me the address and I drove through the streets, in awe. She must've been a millionaire. The houses were massive, grand, Victorian terraces. The streets lined with giant oak trees, Audis and BMW's parked in every drive. When I found hers, I parked my little Golf, feeling very insecure. I quickly checked my hair in the rear view mirror. I was nervous. I loved Hannah, and I think she was quite fond of me, but what if the girls didn't like me? What if this was the deal breaker? What if I didn't get on with them? I didn't know any children. I had no nieces and nephews. What did kids even talk about?

Taking a deep breath, I got out the car and ran up the dozen steps to her purple front door. I rang the door bell and I heard an excited scream. I wasn't sure if it was Hannah or one of the girls. I laughed.

'Hello!' The door was yanked open, but instead of Hannah, there was a two foot, blond ball of excitement, her face smeared with what I hoped was chocolate.

'Hello!' I responded. I knelt down and held out my hand. This was how you greeted kids, right? 'You must be Maddie?' Her little face cracked into a giggle. I hadn't meant to be funny. I must've got them mixed up.

'Nooooooo!' She howled. 'I'm Lily!' She ran off down the hallway, her little feet making an awfully big noise. Moments later, Hannah appeared. She was wearing a red, flowery cooking apron, smeared with chocolate and flour.

'Dan! I didn't hear you ring. You've caught us in the middle of making cakes.' I walked into the house, taking off my shoes and leaving them along side the tiny, medium and big ones already lined up by the door. I kissed her quickly before she led me into the kitchen.

It looked like a bomb had gone off. I couldn't see a surface that wasn't dusted in flour, egg or chocolate. Lily was stood on a stool, wooden stick in hand, attempted to mix the contents of a bowl.

'So you've met Lily.' She pointed to the messy little one. 'And this is Maddie.' She was stood next to the sink, a taller, cleaner version of Lily. She gave me a small nervous smile. I responded with a nervous wave.

'Have you come to help make cakes too?' Lily asked.

'Sure. As long as I can eat them?'

'We'll see.' Lily said sweetly. I couldn't help but laugh. Hannah put an encouraging arm around my waist and led me to stand next to Lily at the counter. She stood next to me, attempting to clean up some of the mess.

'Egg.' Lily demanded. I lent over Hannah to get the box.

'Say please, Lily.' Hannah told her.

'Egg please.' She huffed. I handed her one and she cracked the whole lot into the mixture. 'Uh oh.' She laughed.

'Lily! Mum, look what she's done.' Maddie sighed. She was probably all too aware of her little sisters antics.

'Don't worry.' I said, pulling the bowl in front of me and fishing out the shells. I saw Hannah looking at me out the corner of my eye, smiling happily. It was going well. It hadn't been half as bad as I'd imagined. Maddie was a bit tougher to crack. She seemed to eye me up suspiciously. I could only imagine how difficult it must be for a young girl to lose her father and see her mother with another guy. I tried asking her about school, but she had shrugged and given one word answers.

'Don't worry.' Hannah had whispered in my ear.

Between Lily and I, we had successfully made a dozen cupcakes, put them in the oven and set the timer. I had also, it seemed, made a new best friend. Who would've thought that helping make cakes could cause this kind of bond?

'Dan, can we make more?' She asked. We both looked at her Mummy with expectant smiles. She shook her head and Lily moaned.

'I've got to make dinner soon.'

'But Muuuuuuuum.' I whinged at her, jumping up and down, much to Lily's delight. Even Maddie cracked a smile. Hannah held up a wooden spoon, pointing it at me and shaking her head in dismay.

'I should've known you'd be a child too.' She sighed.

'I'm not a child. Children wouldn't do this-' I snatched the spoon from her and smeared it on her face. She squealed in horror. There was a horrible, gut wrenching moment where I thought she might actually kill me.

'No you didn't. No you didn't!' She laughed, picked up the remainder of the cake mix and set the bowl right down on my head. The girls both stared at me with wide eyes, awaiting my next move. I glared at Hannah. She couldn't suppress her laugh. Her eyes were streaming with tears.

I lunged for her, bowl cast aside, catching her in my arms, and nuzzled my caked hair all over her face. The girls laughed and egged me on as Hannah tried in vain to fight me off. We ended up collapsed on the floor, covered in batter, Lily riding my back and Maddie trying to help up her Mum. All of us giggling.

I think it had gone rather well.