I need this... I need YOU! (lapidot Human AU)

Fine

Peri's POV.

[2 days later]

I breathed slowly, keeping my eyes closed. 2 days had passed since my... fight? I didn't like to call it that but if I'm honest that's what it was.

She hadn't messeged me, or dropped by.

I couldn't blame her. But it was better this way. At least, I kept telling myself that. I felt disgusted, mostly with myself. Lapis didn't deserve all that. Lapis was sweet, and when she tried to help me, I pushed her away.

I was a coward. I was afraid. all the feelings and thoughts I had. I didn't understand at all, i just had  weird.... I didn't know what to call them.

Urges made it sound dirty, feelings made it seem less than what it was... and the only way I escaped them was this. Sitting here, forcing myself to not think. It's all I'd done.

Well, that and go to work, but work didn't make me feel better. Nothing did. And when I couldn't hold back my sleepiness, I dreamed of her.

I rubbed my face again, I didn't understand this. I felt angry at myself, sad at the fact I was alone again, and just ovarall confused at everything.

I groaned, forcing my face into the pillow. I wished I could hate her. I wished she made it easy for me to hate her. Then this would be easy.

But life isn't easy and it doesn't give a flying fuck what you want.

I heard knocking at my door and I sat up. I didn't want to talk to anyone. But oh well. I stood and sleepily made my way to the door. Opening it, I was greeted by a familier face.

"hey... peridot...."

She gave me a "I'm sorry for bothering you" face and I rolled my eyes. "What do you want, Amy?"

She handed me a card. I took it and let my face drop. The party. She still wanted me to go? I sighed. "Look Amy, I just... I don't think I should. I don't feel well..."

"I'm aware. But you need to stop wallowing and get out of this apartment. You're making yourself sick just staying here." She was dead serious.

"I dont..." I wanted to say no, but maybe she was right. Maybe this would be a good opportunity to forget... getting drunk seemed to help whenever I was like this...

"Fine. It's tonight, right?" She nodded, her eyes sparkling.

"I'll come get you at about 8. Try to dress nice, it's not a rager.  A dress or something." She clicked her tongue and a snap of her finger before turning around and running back down the hallway.

A dress?

What did I just get myself into?

[Lol it's 1 am and I'm complete trash and it's Christmas eve EEEEEEEEE

I wanted to ask, if anyone cares to of course, if you guys wanted anything in particular this Christmas?

Besides my FANFIC

I'm kidding. But the three chapter update is gonna be pretty lit.

And it leaves on a cliffhanger because I'm evil and wanna watch you guys squirm and figure out what's gonna happen.

MUAHAHAHAHAHA (cough cough) HAHAHAHAHA

1 more thing, I was thinking I might do a book about... rewriting scenes.

Let me explain:

I've seen a few scenes in lapidot fanfics I would like to end differently (mostly smut, let's be honest) and I wanted to know if you sinners would like me to start a book of requested, rewritten, scenes.

Smut, preferably.

Comment please and tell me what you think, I await the notifications.]