Chapter 2 - You Had Me At Konnichiwa

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NORMAN

"JEEEEZUSOHFUCK!"

'Didn't yell it too loud....did I?'  I pray silently. Trying hard not to clench my eyes shut, in an attempt to dampen the sudden burst of pain.

I blame it on being tired. Forgetting, that is. Forgetting and rubbing my nose with the back of my hand.

Why else would you forget the existence of four screws holding your broken snout in place? And a brand-spanking new eye socket made out of titanium.

Poor Minnie!

Scared the absolute fuck out of her when I rocked up to the sliding doors of her Ryokan. Looking like total shit clad in black denim.

"Mr Norm!  You....you bringing Yakuza with you?"  She whispered fearfully while peering wildly behind me....to see who might follow me in off the street.

"Not this time, Minnie. But had I known?"

"Do you not tease! What happen....you put face under Tokitenku?"

"Nah, no Sumos. Just a windscreen and then a sidewalk in Germany. Now tell me. Is there room at your inn, Minnie? Or do I have to go down the road to Mrs Ryochi's instead?"

Knew that'd get another rise out of her. There's definitely no love lost between the two pint-sized Japanese Ryokan owners.

Mom moved my sister and me to Japan just after she and Dad split up. Taught English classes here. I have a huge love for this country and the many friends who still live here. So I try to get back at least once a year for a visit.

And for the past ten of those? Minnie's Ryokan is always the place I return to. She treats me like a prodigal son and I try to keep living up to my reputation.

I pick up my phone and put it in selfie mode, take a quick peek.

There's still bruising over my nose and left eye, but it's finally fading to autumnal shades of brown and yellow. The scarring is no longer the angry red of the first couple of months and is fading now to a shiny pink.

The doctors tell me it'll all be unnoticeable in a year or so.

***

It happened in Berlin.

I went there to pick up an award for acting. On the next night, I took in a R.E.M concert. Just as I was leaving the venue, the town car I sat in the back of? Got the crap kicked out of it by a truck.

And as I said to Minnie, I did a Peter Pan through the windscreen then faceplanted the sidewalk. One side of my mug took the brunt of the landing....totally shattering my nose and eye socket.

They rebuilt the old schnoz and put in some pins to help keep it stable. It was a scary time though, waiting to hear about the eye injury while wondering if I was gonna lose it completely.

But German doctors are good and managed to replace the pulverised bone with a customised titanium socket.

Four months!

Sixteen long, mind-numbing and demoralising weeks stuck in that hospital. Undergoing operation after operation. Then battling through the slow healing process....and my own head.

Did it on my own, cos I refused to let anyone come see me. Mom, my sister Les, even my ex....Hel and our son Ming. Made them swear to stay away. Couldn't bear to see them worry or even worse....cringe. Once they got a load of my now even uglier excuse for a face.

Eventually, the docs said I could leave and go home to L.A. However they insisted I break up the journey and rest. Otherwise, they weren't going to sign off on my release or travel.

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