EXO Imagines

Xiumin: Our Goodbyes

I asked my mother once, "Is the saddest ending the death of our beloved once?"
Mother said, "No, the saddest ending is when someone leaves you while knowing both of you still loves each other."

I never understood those words.
Not until I'm nearing my end with her.

"Shall we end this now?" She sent a text, after I said I want to leave her.

It brought tears in my eyes. But at the same time, I knew I just love the old her.

She's getting better. She's kind. She's lovable. She's everything someone ever need. She took care of me so good. Maybe too good that I didn't want it. I wanted the old her and I couldn't love the new and better her.

I love the way she flashed her smile. How the wind pushed her hair behind when she turned to me. How genuine her laugh could be most of the time. How cute her voice was when we were on the phone. How kind and loving she could be with me. How she treated me so well that I felt like a bad person for making her cry.

But that's all the small parts I love about her.
The most important trait she had that made me fell for her hard was how she made me felt special in someway I couldn't explain. How she made me felt like I was the only one.

But that trait; the best trait yet in her was gone forever.

"Bye" was the only thing that I managed send to her. It hurt me so much that I felt like karma was laughing at me.

Serve you right, Xiumin. She gave her everything and when you decided to leave her, she let you go in a good way. She made you feel bad til the very end and that's your punishment.

I cried.
It hurt.
The day before she asked me what could be worse; seeing your love breakdown in front of you because of you or seeing your love moving on to someone else, knowing your love will never come back?

I answered seeing my love moving on to someone else. And maybe in a few days or weeks or months or years, I'll witness that with my heart still aching for her kindness.

She was far too kind for me. Far too great. Far too cheerful and far too patient. She was better than before but like I say, I don't want anything better, I only want the old her.

She left me on 'seen', and I took my time to stare at that contact name I saved for her. I love her name but I love 'cutiepie' more on her.

Oh, and she did told me that she's sorry for making me went through this and left the hole in my heart she filled once empty with nothing in it.
See? I told you she's too nice.

Now that she's not mine, what should I do? After all, I was just a confused teenage boy.

Mother was right. All those love stories of how a person's death was the saddest ending was not true. It wouldn't be the saddest ending if both of us love each other and accept each others' flaws til our last breath.

The saddest ending was seeing each other part ways but knowing that the two hearts still wanted to be together.