Angels (Pavel Chekov)

25 - Sought

Vienna does get back later that night and seems bubblier than usual. Pavel looks up and notices she's wearing makeup and her hair is out for once. Most of the time, she has it tied up but tonight she looks beautiful and Pavel doesn't have the heart to tell her.

"You're awake," she smiles. "Are you feeling better now? I've missed you."

"I'm alright," he manages, closing his book and putting it on the floor beside him. "How was your night?"

"It was really nice. We had dinner at this curry place and then went for a walk through the city. This guy winked at Sydel and she went all red. I really wish you would have come. Is your migraine gone now? Did you sleep it off?"

"I think so," he says softly. "I'm just super tired."

"You seem really tired. You're not really yourself at the moment, are you?"

He shakes his head, hoping she doesn't ask any more questions. She asks what he's been doing aside from sleeping and he tells her just writing and drawing, which is true. He's not holding out conversation like he normally does and she doesn't know whether to point it out or not. He said he's just tired, she leaves it at that.

"Have you eaten dinner?" She asks, after a long period of silence. He doesn't feel like eating, he can't exactly tell why.

"I haven't eaten dinner but I'm not really be hungry."

"Hm, it's not like you to not eat. You must be coming down with something, Pavel. We need to get some medicine into you. Something that'll pick up your mood too."

"I'm not sick," he mutters, realising his statement is going to raise a few questions.

"You're not sick?"

He swallows. "I'm just in a mood. I'm not sick though. Medicine won't do anything. I don't really want to talk about it."

"Did I do something or say something?"

"No, you didn't."

She has a lot more questions but studies his facial expression and decides not to pester him any further. She moves his legs over and sits beside him. He appreciates it even if he doesn't show it. She asks if he wants to lay in her lap and he nods, letting her play with his hair as he sighs.

"You can talk to me Pavel. You don't have to bottle everything up in that journal. I'm here for you. You always listen to me when I'm stressed and anxious, I'd love to do the same for you. I care about you. I always have."

His eyes start watering then. He wants to tell her everything. He wants her to hold him for the rest of the night and tell him she cares over and over again.

"I... I had a bad night Vienna," he admits, wiping his eyes across his sleeve.

"A bad night? What do you mean? Did you... did you cut, Pavel?"

"I ran into Damien. He... He told me I was pathetic and... He said you have a friend in your dentistry class that he knows, and that you admitted you're just with me because you pity me..."

"And what makes you think there's any truth behind that? What makes you think Damien would be telling the truth? I don't feel that way at all and I never have. I'm not with you out of pity, I'm with you for a million other reasons."

He sits up and wipes his eyes again. She puts her hand on his back and he tries to calm himself down a little. She shuffles closer to him and hugs around his waist, wishing that he would have said something last night.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry Vienna."

He turns around so he can hug her properly and he squeezes her tightly. She kisses the top of his head and asks him how bad the damage is. He doesn't say anything. That much he doesn't want to answer. He just shakes his head and she sighs.