Angels (Pavel Chekov)

67 - Life & Death

Vienna starts walking and almost doesn't hear a voice call out her name. She turns around and McCoy motions her over, an obvious frustration on his face.

He's got Kirk around his arm and he asks her to give him a hand. She takes Kirk's other side and asks what happened to him and McCoy rolls his eyes before giving her an answer. He explains his plan and asks Vienna where she's assigned to.

"Pfft? The USS Hood? Don't bother. Come help me with Kirk. He's heavy and annoying the crap outta me. Let's go."

Vienna doesn't argue, just giving Bones a hand with Kirk and finding the shuttle they're supposed to be on. McCoy argues with the commander and wins, bringing up the medical code about treatment of patients. Vienna just keeps her head down and helps Kirk into his seat.

"Which ship are we going to? The Farragut?"

"God no," McCoy mutters. "The Enterprise. Kirk's not supposed to be on there either. He's on academic suspension and grounded until further notice but I can't leave him back there looking all pathetic, you know? I could use you with me, I need someone who has your sense of empathy."

Vienna doesn't go to question it anymore, just glad that she's getting dragged onto the Enterprise. She decides it's probably in her best interest not to tell Pavel just yet. They're warping into a distress call and she knows he's on the bridge anyone and doesn't need the distraction. She helps get Kirk into medbay and avoids the Vulcan man that was arguing with Kirk during the trial. Her head is racing a little and she just hopes that whatever's happening will be over soon.

Everything happens far too fast for Vienna's liking. It seems that one minute she's with Bones in medbay, listening to Chekov on the shipwide commcast and the next, the ship throws them to the side and she's working overtime in medbay. She's not technically a qualified nurse, having done most of her study in alien dentistry but she knows how to give hypos and bandage, which seems to be enough. There's an influx of people, Vulcan and human and she has no idea what's happening outside of the medbay walls.

One of her patients is shaking and she takes their hands, asking if they're okay.

"The ship," she whispers. "It's gone. It's all gone. Only a few of us made it out... Only..."

The person in front of Vienna starts crying then. She passes them a box of tissues and starts work fixing a cut across their shoulder. She feels a deep sickness right in the bottom of her stomach and lets a focus take over her, not wanting to feel anything until the ship calms down.

McCoy pulls Vienna aside. He tells her that Kirk just got banished to an ice planet, that the Romulans have attacked and that the other fleet ships were destroyed. Vienna shakes her head a little, not able to believe what's going on. He tells her that Pike has been captured and everything else he goes to explain doesn't sink in.

"McCoy, you saved my life. You saved me. If you hadn't have brought me on this ship... I would have died. You..."

"Listen," he says softly. "I need to get back to the bridge. Stay here. Keep doing what you're doing."

Vienna just nods, her brain cloudy and her thoughts stormy.

Time blurs and a senior medical officer sends Vienna into the mess to eat something before she passes out. She makes it half way before spotting a curly haired boy in a yellow shirt. She calls his name, he doesn't turn around. She picks up speed and touches his shoulder. There's a fear in his eyes when he sees her.

"Enya?" He says weakly, his eyes looking her up and down, trying to determine whether she's real or not. She nods, saying his name softly and breathing a sigh of relief when he flings his arms around her.

"Pasha," she whispers, squeezing him tightly.

"Enya, the ships... They were all destroyed, all of them. I thought you... I thought you were gone. I was so sure. I was so sure." He starts babbling in Russian, not loosening his grip on her. His eyes are starting to cloud over as he talks and she buries her face into his shoulder.

She asks what happened. He lets go of her and she notices just how pale his face looks.

"I... I... Mister Spock's mother."

"What do you mean...?"

"I let her die, Vienna." He pauses to wipe his eyes. "I... She was standing on these rocks and all of a sudden, she fell. I couldn't catch her... I let her die."

"Pasha," she whispers, taking his hands.

"Mister Spock's face... I can't get it out of my head."

"Pavel, come to medbay, you need to-"

"No," he cuts her off. She looks up at him, speechless. "I have a job to do. I am not going to medbay."

"You just went through a traumatic experience, you're unfit for duty."

"Vienna, don't you dare try and tell them I'm unfit for duty. Do not try and take me off that bridge. I need to be on there. I need to be the one at those controls. I can't trust anyone but myself up there. I refuse to have you making calls that could jeopardise that. I'm doing my job, I don't need you to come here and start babying me. I'm not some soft of danger up there or something! Stay out of it, okay?!"

There's a silence then. Vienna feels hot tears under her eyelids and a thousand things she wants to say all at once. She hasn't seem him angry like this, not at her anyway. She's angry now. Her chest burns and she wants to scream some sense into him.

"You listen to me, Pavel Chekov. I don't care if you know every star in the damn sky because I know you and I have every right to worry about what would happen if you were back at that console."

"I can work under pressure. I need to do my job, don't stand here and try and stop me. If you truly love me you'll let me do what I'm supposed to."

"Don't you go trying to pull that card," she snaps. "You know very well that I'm doing this because I love you!"

"No," he says, his voice firm and unfaltering. "No, Vienna, you're not."

He leaves then and Vienna watches as he does, swearing she can feel her heart break as he doesn't turn back. They haven't fought like this before. She just starts walking, doing anything she can to get away from the empty corridor where she feels empty too.

(Author's Note)

Right lemme give a lil breakdown here in regards to Pavel's breakdown.

Our boy Pavel has just been through a traumatic experience. He feels guilt and a whole lot of stress. His emotions would be all over the place, and he'd be trying super hard to keep himself composed on the bridge. Also, Pavel's still just a kid. I feel as though he wouldn't be emotionally mature enough to handle something like this well and because of that, I feel like it's valid (plausible) that he snaps and takes out his emotions on someone he loves.

Also, he's jumping from extremity to extremity. The initial fear and uncertainty that he's lost her, trying to ignore that fear so he can keep cool and do his job properly like he's trained to do. And then finding out she's okay and that euphoria, to him then admitting to her what's happened and reliving it all over again. Like man, of course he's going to be scrambled.

Should he be reacting like that to Vienna? Pfffft no, it's uncalled for but he's in such a high pressure situation and under so much personal stress that it's not surprising he's breaking down.

Rightio k thanks fro coming to my TED talk.
Enjoy ♪