By the Angel

Chapter 12

He's looking up at me then every bit as surprised as I am. I mean I knew it would be amazing but that...

"Wow, " he says as he lightly brushes his fingertips along his lips, mirroring my own response.

I'm trying not to catapult my self Into his arms but it's not an easy task especially when he's looking at me like I'm the only girl that has or ever will matter to him. Every second I'm not in his arms is pure torment. I lay down on the hard concrete not caring about getting my new dress dirty or anything else for that matter.
Within seconds he's lying right beside me looking at me again.

"Wow," he says again, after a momentary pause he's smiling at me," what are you thinking about?"
There is so many answers to that question, I'm thinking about a lot of things, too many in fact. I went from feeling numb pretty much all the time to feeling every emotion the human body can experience and all in just a few hours. It's too much.

"You," I say honestly. Not as embarrassed as I thought I would be with that admission.
"Same" he replies huskily, "I don't think I'll ever be able to stop."
He turns to me then wrapping his arms around my waist and I fold into his embrace, like he's the air to my every breath, like he's all I have ever need and perhaps he is.

I never thought I would need anyone else, much less admit that fact but in just a few days Jace has changed everything I thought was permanent. My mind set, my emotions. I find myself even wanting to open up to him about that night.

Something not even Luke and Simon know the full details of. They know bits and pieces, the major events of that night but I've never been upfront with the entirety of it. That has been my knowledge alone to bear and it's a heaviness I didn't know was weighing down on me until I met someone I wanted to share that burden with.

For the first time I notice a ring hanging around his neck on a long silver chain, "what's that?" I ask as I gently touch the hard metal.

"It was my fathers, he and my mother died when I was a kid. I usually don't wear it, but I took it out for luck today. It seems to have worked. "

"Oh, Jace I'm so sorry," Every day I wake up wishing one of my parents would disappear and here he is facing the reality of it. I wish my biological father could take his fathers place. So that he could have him back and I would be rid of Valentine forever.

"It was a long time ago, it doesn't hurt so much anymore, at least not constantly like it used to. The lightwoods adopted me the same day and have treated me like their own ever since. I'm forever grateful  to them."

"They all seem wonderful from what Magnus has told me, you didn't have to tell me that, thank you."

He shrugs his shoulders, "I want you to know me Clary, I'll answer any question you have for me."

Part of me wants to confess everything to him right now, all of it, even if it means reliving the past I want nothing more than to forget. I open my mouth to do just that, but I'm interrupted by my phone screaming the lyrics to All these things I hate.

Immediately I'm filled with dread because I know exactly who it is. I glance at my cell, confirming its Valentine. He must have sensed I was happy and called to ruin it. I send it to voicemail praying he doesn't antagonize me further. Not today, please angels from up above not today. Just let me have today.

"All these things I hate revolve around me!" My phone sings over and over. Making a beloved song turn into a damn nightmare.

Not today. Please.

"Who are we screening?"

"Valentine  Morgenstern, my biological father." I sigh , I hate saying the word father in any context to describe that selfish bastard.

"Morgenstern?" Jace asks, his eyebrows knitting together in confusion. I don't blame him for being bewildered my life is a complete mess.  Valentine destroys everything good in my life, he took Magnus away, I've worked my ass off to hide my relationship with Luke.

The only person Valentine hasn't tried to run off is Simon... but I'm sure next week he'll try to torpedo our friendship to. He tries to take everything I love away from me. He is not ruining this, I won't let him. Not that I love Jace... not yet.

"My Mom and Valentine were divorced for a brief time before I was born, during that time she changed her name back to Fray, when they remarried she never changed it back."

A dry chuckle escapes my lips, "probably the only sensible thing she's ever done as far as he's concerned."

The phone rings again and despite my better judgement I answer the phone.

"What!" I fume, praying it's about something else, literally anything else.

"Where are you?" He says calm and collected, sounding like a fucking serial killer.

"At Simons," I lie through my teeth hoping he doesn't hear my teeth chattering.

"Really? That's a pretty purple dress for just hanging out with Simon. Did he recently die his hair blonde? He's a lot taller than I remember."

My blood runs cold at the mention of Jace. I'm not afraid of Valentine, not anymore at least not for myself. I'm terrified for everyone I love. He realized two years ago he couldn't hurt me anymore so he went after everyone in my life instead. There has never been a single threat that he hasn't followed through on.

That's why I cut Magnus out, Luke thinks I'm worth the risk but I won't let anyone else make that mistake.

"Calmly let your date know it's time for him to take you home."

"You can't tell me what to do anymore."

"Are you sure about that?" Look down at golden boys chest. Do it now Clary or lose him forever."

I hesitantly glance down to see a red circle on his green shirt directly over his heart. I take a deep breath summoning ever ounce of courage I have. I have to play this off perfectly, if Jace suspects a thing, I would be putting his life in danger.

"I'm on my way." I say hanging up.
A look of disappointment flashes across  his face.

"I have to go," I say and as the words escape my lips all I want to do is cry. But what choice do I have?

"Is everything okay Ember?" He says brushing my cheek with his graceful fingers.

"Everything is fine, just family drama." He nods his head and I almost sigh from relief he doesn't suspect. He gets up offering his hand. I take it and push him in front of me as we walk off the rooftop. He tries to walk beside me but I gently nudge him in front of me again. If Valentine is going to take a shot at Jace he'll have to go through me.

"I want to admire your ass, don't take that away from me." I say laughing light heartedly even though on the inside my heart is tearing open.
He laughs that musical melody that makes my insides melt.

Over the years I have perfected the art of lying,  I'm good at it, too good. Maybe it's a natural skill from being of Morgenstern blood or maybe it's from all the years I spent covering up the bruises. Valentine wasn't home much but when he was he made damn sure his presence was remembered in the most brutal way possible.