Can't Fall in Love Without You (Christian Yelich)

11

Dinner sounds great, Christian. I'll be there around 6:30 and I'll bring some wine!

What on Earth was he thinking? He was an awful cook. Sloane always cooked because she loved to, even if she wasn't great at it... Before Sloane? He lived on Chipotle, or QDoba when it had been 4 days of Chipotle in a row. He was miserable at anything remotely science-y.

Yet, here he was. He found the easiest thing he could, Swedish meatballs, and got to work.

Thank god for frozen meatballs.

He was whisking everything together and making sure there were no flour patches when he looked at the clock. 6:24. Shit. The noodles. Okay. He had this.

As he was straining the noodles, he wasn't paying attention to Ivy's bright grin, which disappeared once he turned back around.

"Daddy's got this under control, princess. Miss Elizabeth will not be grossed out tonight," he smiled and kissed the top of her head and went back to the sauce, putting the meatballs in and letting it simmer.

He was sure that it was delicious. It had to be. He tried so hard to make sure it was good.

6:32. Three gentle knocks.

"Hi," Christian smiled, completely unaware of the flour on his left pec, easily visible against the deep maroon of his t-shirt.

"Why hello there. You look like you had quite the adventure," she couldn't keep in the laughs, gently brushing the flour off his chest.

"Oh geez. I was trying to be impressive and I end up looking like the dough boy," he sighed and welcomed her in.

"Christian, I'm your friend. You don't need to impress me," Elizabeth laughed and gave him a warm hug.

"Yeah, but you're a doctor," he shrugged, a gentle smile on his face.

Elizabeth noticed that it didn't quite meet his eyes like in the photo she saw early that morning.

"And? You're an amazing father, Christian. So you already impressed me," she smiled and picked up Ivy, giving the six-week-old a few kisses on the cheek. She felt like an auntie to the little girl, she loved her so much.

What she wasn't expecting, however, was the bright gummy grin that she was greeted with. "Oh hi there, miss Ivy. Who's a pretty girl?" she grinned back, coaxing an even bigger smile out of the infant.

Elizabeth looked over at Christian, who was watching with an unreadable expression.

That smile... It was a carbon copy of Sloane's. Of the impromptu smile that was captured on their wedding day. A rush of love and happiness filled him, but also a rush of crushing hurt.

"Christian? You okay?" Elizabeth frowned, and handed Ivy over to the shell-shocked man.

"Oh, beautiful. Daddy loves you," Christian said softly and kissed the top of Ivy's head. And boy, was he rewarded. Ivy gave him an even bigger grin and an excited coo, kicking her tiny legs.

Her eyes were changing, and the brightness from her grin showed off the green that was creeping into the crystal blue. Just like her mom.

Elizabeth sensed a change in his demeanor and plated the dinner, pouring him a glass of wine in the process.

"What's going on, Christian?" Elizabeth said softly, gently laying her hand over his.

"She... her smile. It's the same as her mom's," Christian said softly, convinced that Elizabeth wouldn't want to be his friend anymore once she knew that he was responsible for his wife's death.

"It's a beautiful smile," Elizabeth smiled gently, just letting him guide the course of the conversation. She kept his hand over his and ate her dinner, showing him that there was no pressure. "You need to eat, Christian. You don't have to tell me anything you don't want to, but you need to eat," she said gently but firmly.

Christian nodded and laid Ivy in her swing before eating about half of his food and chugging his entire glass of wine.

"Sloane... my wife. She... she died recently," he barely choked it out, hand shaking under Elizabeth's. "Hemorrhaged after birth..." he whispered, face studying the table.

He looked up when he felt her fingers interlaced with his, gently squeezing his hand.

"It wasn't your fault, Christian. I know it can feel like it is... I know that this must be so unbelievably hard and painful. I'm so sorry, Christian. And I'm always here, okay? Even if you just need to cry, I'm here," she said softly.

It was exactly what he needed to hear. To have a friend like her.

"Thank you," he whispered and wiped his eyes. "Can I... would it be too much to get a hug?" He asked lowly, desperately needing the human contact.

"If you need a hug, you never have to ask," she promised and gave him the best hug he's had in months.

Christian buried his face in her shoulder and cried, overwhelmed by his emotions.

"You're so strong. That beautiful girl adores your every movement. You are so, so strong, Christian. And you are going to survive this. You have Travis, Lindy, and I. You have your friends. We're all here for you in a heartbeat," she promised and cradled the back of his head as he cried into her scrubs.

After about 10 minutes, he pulled away and wiped his nose.

"Let's watch a movie?" he asked, picking Ivy up and melting at her brilliant smile.

"I'll grab the popcorn."

He could do this. He had three amazing friends, and they were helping him get stronger every day.