"She can't!" I hear someone yell. I sit up and slowly take in my surroundings. "Kayla dear are you ready to leave?" The nurse asks smiling. "You mean ready to go get locked up? sure why not" I scoff as I pull on a jumper from Luke. That's right. I'm being sent to a rehabilitation center for six months. Oh joy. "Hey baby" Mum greets. I flinch when she gets near me. Ever since I've been here I've been having flashbacks to the day I started cutting and it is awful. "Jai is out in the hall" Luke whispers patting my back. I nod and trudge my way towards Jai. "Kayla-" he starts. "Please just hug me" I whisper cutting him off. He nods and wraps his protective arms around me.
"Six months isn't that long" Beau defends playing with my hair. "Yeah if you aren't locked up under 24/7 security watch" I sing as I put the hair dye in Luke's hair. "This better look good Kay" he threatens. "It will" I defend as I continue running my fingers through his hair .
"Jai I love you" I whisper. "I know. But I can't keep hurting you Kayla. You will find someone who won't hurt you. Someone who will make you extremely happy and make you feel special" Jai replies and I feel my heart ache. I know what he's saying is true but I can't bring myself to believe his words. We've been through so much and now, we're just throwing it all away. "Why can't anything go right for us? We don't deserve this. We deserve happiness and when I'm with you and with the boys that's where I find that I actually have happiness inside of me. That I actually can feel it and then there's always something that screws it up!" I exclaim loudly. Beau looks at me startled. I shake my head and go towards the bathroom but beau stops me. "Right. No privacy" I scoff letting him go first. "We're doing this for you" Beau whispers softly. "I just want to be alone" I scream. "Kayla please look at me" Beau states. I take in deep breaths and look in to his eyes. "You will be okay. You can get through this. I promise you. These six months will be the quickest months of your life" Beau says softly. "Thank you" I whisper wrapping my arms around him.
I open up Twitter and send out my last tweet for 6 months. 'gonna miss this social media world. Lots of love. Don't forget to support my boys xx kay' I lock my phone and give it to Luke. At the rehab we aren't allowed to have our own technology. We have to use the ones provided. "I'm gonna miss you" I mumble hugging all the guys individually. Everyone including Maz and Sam and Alex were there. "We love you!" Everyone shouts as my mum, Tay and I walk inside. Yes, Tay. She moved back in while I was in the hospital and we got as close as we were, even closer, then when we were younger. "I love you sis" Tay exclaims wrapping her arms around my tightly. "I love you too" I mumble letting her go. "Don't forget me" Sebastian whines and I hug him softly. Sebastian is Tay's 1 1/2 year old son. "Bye Mum" I mutter before walking towards reception.
"Natalie?" The lady calls leading me in to a room. "My new roommate?" 'Natalie' asks walking out of another room. "Yeah and you know the rules. Kayla this is Nat" the lady introduces. "H-hi" I say awkwardly. "I don't bite I promise" Nat laughs as the lady leaves. "What have you heard about me?" I ask quietly unpacking my bags. "Just that you are in for self harm. Just like me" Nat shrugs. "So what do we have first?" I question. We all went by a little schedule. "Group" She answers pulling on a neon beanie. "Sick hat collection. My friends would love them" saying this I smile thinking of the 5 idiots. They went back to LA after they left me here.
"Kayla this is group. All of you are here for self harm purposes" Dr.Lank informs me. I nod and everyone begins talking. "So when was the first time you committed self harm?" Someone asks. "Th-three four years ago" I stutter out in response. "Why did you?" A guy with jet black hair swept over his eyes asks. "It-it's rea-really hard to ex-explain" I stutter. My whole world was collapsing. What was I supposed to say? Flat out 'I cut myself because my mom'. I couldn't do that no matter how much she hurt me.
"I'm Aiden" the guy with black hair introduces. "H-hi. Kayla" I reply smiling weakly. "So do you wanna grab some coffee?" Aiden asks. "Um I'm actually n-not allowed out of the eastern wing" I admit. "I'll get the coffee and I'll meet you in the Rec Room on the east side" Aiden compromises. "Oh uh okay" I reply weakly.
"Tell me about yourself Kayla" Aiden urges handing me my coffee. And so I did. Every last detail. I don't know why I just felt like Aiden knew what I was going through and could understand my situation. "Tell me about yourself Aiden" I urge sipping my drink. Aiden told me his story and I was almost on the verge of tears. I knew people had it bad but I couldn't help but want to cry at Aiden's story. "I'm here for you" I Manage to choke out. "I'm here for you too" Aiden smiles.
AUTHORS NOTE: HEY ITS BEEN A WHILE. I DIDNT FORGET YOU GUYS I PROMISE.
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