An evolution is rising. From man to creature. Human to monster. Lover to hater. Friend to enemy. Hidden in the shadows, lurks a danger on a silent move. Beware of the sharp and painful teeth, they will trick you with a smile.
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"I don't know where to begin. I carry more than you see" All is Soft Inside, Aurora Aksnes.
Umji paced back and forth in what was once Sowon's beloved home. It was cold in here, and not just because there was a warm missing presence. Sowon left some of the windows open and that's why it got cold, especially at night when the weather cooled down.
Umji quickly closed the windows and locked them. Everything was gone, not even a single crumb left on the floor. Walls were plain, pictures were gone, the fridge was empty. Not a single soul remained in here, not even Umji's. She felt numb to everything going on around her. Sowon kept her warm, and without her she was cold and numb.
Umji frowned and made her way up the stairs to see if there was anything left that Sowon and Eunha perhaps might've left. Umji checked every room except for Sowon's. She closed the bathroom door in the long hallway and went back towards Sowon's big room.
Even her scent was gone. Not a single vivid image in here remained of them all together, or even of them alone. It was gone, all of it. All of their past had disappeared and also left with Sowon and Eunha. Umji had nothing left, she had nothing to lose. Even she was gone. She was lost in a world of hurt and abandonment. This was the ultimate torture. Loneliness.
Umji looked at the bed and saw that Sowon had left her sheets neatly on the bed. Umji sat on the bed and grabbed the folded up blanket. Merely a scent of Sowon was left. She could barley smell it, but it brought the memories back. She tried to hold onto it but the more she reached out the more it disappeared. It kept disappearing, until it was gone.
"What are you doing?" A woman asked, leaning against the doorway.
"Oh my" Umji's heart stopped for a moment. She hurriedly removed the blanket from her face that she was previously smelling. It seemed a bit weird of course.
"Sorry" the woman awkwardly laughed. "I didn't mean to scare you" she apologized.
"No it's fine. Wait a minute, how did you get in here? And who are you?" Umji questioned. She let go of everything and kept her guard up.
"I should probably introduce myself before you claw my eyes out. I'm Jimin, I was Jae's girlfriend. I don't think we've had the chance to meet yet" She held out her hand for Umji to shake, not realizing that Umji could sometimes be a bit of a germaphobic.
"We haven't met yet" Umji looked down at her hand and looked back up at her and smiled instead of shaking her hand. Umji knew she could trust this young lady.
"It's been a rough few days, hasn't it?" She sat down next to Umji on the bed.
"A rough year" Umji painfully laughed.
"I understand. We have lost some wonderful people. My boyfriend died, I can imagine how you feel about Sowon and Eunha. I lost Sowon too, but I didn't really know Eunha" she said as she stared at her fidgeting hands.
"I feel like I lost everyone" Umji confessed. Sowon had mentioned Jimin's name a few times. She always said that Jimin was very trustworthy and would withhold any secret that was shared by another person that she valued.
"And that's okay. It's okay to feel that way sometimes, but not for too long. We need to feel these emotions. You need to feel them" she gently pressed her hand against Umji's back and began to move her hand in a circular motion, trying to comfort her.
"I don't want to feel them"
"No one does. You still have SinB and Yuju, that's something to be happy about" Jimin shrugged.
"No I don't" Umji scoffed and acted as if Jimin's words were an utter lie to the face.
"What do you mean by that? You have an amazing girlfriend and the funniest best friend you could ever ask for. I also heard that Yerin and the group are getting along better now"
"Forget SinB. She kissed her new friend that she's only known for like two months, maybe even less" Umji rolled her eyes. That explains why she was feeling more down and upset then usual. There was no way she'd just let Sowon alone affect her like this.
"Oh Umji" Jimin sighed and hung her head low. She couldn't understand how someone could do such a thing to somebody else, especially a person like Umji.
"I don't know what happened. Where did I go wrong? What did I do to make her do this to me?" Umji broke down in tears. She had held those tears in for as long as she could remember.
"It wasn't your fault" Jimin felt for her. No one deserved this, no one.
"What if it was? I didn't do anything wrong" Umji covered her face.
"Maybe she's just not the one for you? For years now Sowon has told me about how Eunbi was obsessed with Yerin, obviously that's the one Eunbi wants. They're meant for each other, there is someone else out there looking for you, waiting for you. There is still so much time to find the one, you don't need to rush" Jimin comforted her. She had gotten pretty good at it over the years because of Sowon.
"But I love her"
"But maybe she doesn't love you like that. She loves you as a friend and a pack mate, you're like a sister to her but I think the only reason she is dating you is because she feels bad for you" Jimin hated to put it that way and let it out so bluntly but lying to Umji would do no good for either one of them.
"I want to be loved like that. I need someone"
"Sometimes just caring for someone will show you that they love you. Let me take care of you for awhile so you at least will feel a little bit better" Jimin gave a promising look. She wasn't going to take no for an answer.
"I'll never feel better" Umji slowly leaned her body back until her back and head fell on top of the bed. She could lay there forever, imaging that Sowon was laying beside her, but her hand that rested on the silk sheets wouldn't lie. Her hand that reached out for her proved that Sowon's body wasn't there anymore.
