ENDLESS

S5 Chapter 7

ISAAC MARTIN

MONTH: APRIL

I think one of my greatest fears is to be alone. It's quite an ironic one when you're the type of person who constantly feels lonely like I do- but there's a huge difference.

Loneliness is isolation while being alone is solitude. And while I do always feel that sense of social exclusion, it's a lot better than being by yourself.

The world is a vast place, filled with wolves howling at your door and waiting for you to open it. They wait and wait, with their sharp teeth aching and saliva drooling in anticipation of taking a bite into your soul. It might be a depressing metaphor, but how else do you explain bad people?

 I'm surrounded by them. These 'wolves' are my classmates— their 'teeth' are their degrading words, and their saliva is their response in waiting for my reaction.

And unfortunately these wolves howled at my door everyday.

''Don't sit next to him. He probably smells because of how fat he is.''

''I wouldn't want to sit next to him, anyway. He'd probably take up both of our seats.''

Sometimes I wondered if they talked that loud on purpose. I had to admit, I wasn't fit. Not at all. I am as chubby as they say I am. I'm not sure how I got this way. Maybe it was puberty. Maybe it was because I didn't work out or ate healthy foods.

Maybe it was all of the above.

But running around, lifting weights, throwing balls— it wasn't that appealing compared to curling up on my bed and diving into a good book. Literature had a way of fueling my spirit more than anything else did. It was truly one of the best ways to spend one's time.

There are times where I wish I was as athletic as Carter and Bailey. And frankly, those thoughts did occupy my mind more than I'd like to admit. Maybe if I was like them I wouldn't be getting bullied for my weight.

One of the only things I had bragging rights about were my grades, and even then the wolves would make me feel bad about that. They would tell me that I'm a nerd and that only losers with no lives get straight A's.

I tried not to open the door for these wolves. I didn't want them to tear me apart any longer.

But sometimes, they just break down the door. And that's how my life has been ever since I started school.

Now it wasn't worrying about them coming in. It was worrying about when they would have their feast. There were days when the wolves wouldn't bother me, then there were days when they did.

Today was one of those days.

As I entered my last class for the day, I immediately glanced around for any sign of their faces. They were a pack of four seventh graders. Since my seventh period was gym where they mixed the grades together, that's how we met.

Tyler, Kyle and Quentin are their names. They were an iconic bunch to the rest of the class and teachers. They were the ones always causing trouble or being caught horse-playing. The last member of their group was sort of aloof, he didn't participate in what they did but he hanged around them. His name is Griffin. I don't consider him one of the wolves.