ENDLESS

S5 Chapter 8

SCARLETT JENKINS

MONTH: JULY

Crimson red. The blood that left her body and surrounded her was such a dark color that it almost looked black. But the red tint was still fairly evident.

Her lifeless face, brown eyes open in horror and pain from her last breath. Her body, weak and fragile as it laid on the ground.

It's all your fault.

"Like father, like daughter."

"Stop!" I screamed, sitting up abruptly. My eyes glared through the dark of the room. I felt my bed underneath me. There wasn't any blood, her dead body wasn't in front of me.

It was just a nightmare..

"Scarlett?!" Carter called beside me, sounding alarmed. I didn't notice he had woken up. He sat on the bed next to me. "What happened? Did you have another nightmare?"

I stared at him, my eyes quickly welling up with tears.

I killed someone.

She's dead because of me.

"Scarlett?" Carter whispered, even more concerned than before.

I started bawling, my chest heaving up and down as my breathing went irregular. I sucked in whatever air I could as the cries escaped my throat and the tears trickled down my face.

Carter gently pulled me into a hug. He held me tight against him as he rubbed circles on my back in attempt to calm me down. "Shh, it's okay."

I hid my face in his shirt, continuing to sob relentlessly. The pain and guilt I carried was insufferable. I could never forgive myself for that night. If only I wasn't so stupid, maybe it wouldn't have happened.

Carter stayed silent, bringing a hand up to my hair. He grabbed a curl and twisted it around his finger. He knew I liked having my hair played with, it was calming. I felt my body begin to relax as the cries I was letting out slowly died down to whimpers and sniffling.

As the tears stopped forming I backed away from him to breathe. I noticed that there was now a spot on his shirt was wet from my sobbing. "Scarlett."

His voice brought my attention back up to his face. "What was the nightmare about?"

I glanced back down. I stared nowhere in particular, trying to prepare myself to share. "I.. I'm a monster, Carter."

"What?" Carter exclaimed in surprise. "Scarlett you're anything but-"

"I have blood on my hands, Carter. I shouldn't even be here. My mom died.. died trying to save me. I don't even deserve it. She had more life left to live but she wasted it by jumping in front of me. I'm supposed to be dead, not her. Killing Soul didn't avenge her. It's only made me feel more guilty. I just proved that I am like my father. That I am a monster.."

''You're not a monster," Carter began, staring intensely at me. His eyes were boring holes into my soul from his gaze alone. "Your mother sacrificed her own life to save yours because she saw that your life was worth protecting. I would do the same for you in a heartbeat. You got blood on your hands because you wanted to save the ones you love. If you didn't do it, I wouldn't be here. None of us would. You saved me, Scarlett. You saved me, my family, even the paramedics. No one blames you either. They've done the same. My aunt? My mom? My dad? My uncle? All of them have either sacrificed themselves, had someone who did to help them, or got blood on their hands themselves. But they're not monsters. They're far from that. If they didn't do any of those things, they wouldn't be here either. But we are because of the risks they took. You're here because of the risk your mom took. I'm here because of yours. I owe my life to you. Everyone there that night did. You're not a monster, Scarlett—" He grabbed both of my hands, rubbing them gently. "You're a hero.''