Mahal Kita Pero (BoyxBoy)

Chapter 43

"I love you." He whispered while grasping for air.

"I love you too, Yuji. You are the sweetest monster I've ever known." I answered and kissed his lips again.

We were hugging each other until my phone rang.

"Wait. I'll just answer my phone." I said and immediately got up to pick up my phone. "It's Matt." I informed him after reading the name of the caller.

"I guess you two need to talk. I'll just go ahead and take a shower." He came near me and kissed my forehead before going to the restroom.

When he's already inside, I answered Matt's call.

"Hi, Matt. How are you?" I greeted him. I miss my bestfriend so much. This is the first time that we've never seen each other for so long.

"I'm okay. Ikaw? Kumusta kayo ni Yuji?" I suddenly felt uncomfortable. Imbis na mag-usap kami tungkol sa amin, I don't know why it was about Yuji and I all of a sudden.

"We're good. Nasa Batangas na kami, Matt." I answered. "Ikaw? How's your training?" I tried to change the topic because I know that it will only hurt him if I tell him the truth.

"Tiring. Still got a lot of things to learn but I got this."

"That's the spirit. Alam ko namang kaya mo talaga." Pagpapagaan ko ng loob niya. I know how hard he tries to satisfy his father's expectation on him kaya makakayanan niya talaga.

"So, sinabi na ba ni Yuji sa 'yo?" Napakunot ang noo ko after he asked that.

"All this time, alam mo?" I asked.

"Hindi naman ako bulag, Enzo. I know that he likes you. Pero ikaw, Enzo? Do you feel the same way?" Nagulat ako nang halos walang preno ang mga tinatanong niya sa akin ngayon and I know how much it will hurt him if I say the truth.

"Matthew." I don't want to talk about this. I don't want him to feel bad because of me because he don't deserve it.

"It's a yes, huh?" I heard his fake laugh after asking that and I didn't answer. I don't know how to answer. I don't want to lie on him but I don't want to hurt him as well. Hindi ko alam kung saan ako lulugar. "Ayaw kong isumbat pero bata pa lang tayo, ako na 'yung nandyan para sa 'yo. I was with you when nobody wanted to be your friend. I was with you, making you smile no matter how hard it is for you to be happy. I even adjusted. Funny because I expected that after all those things that I've done, ako na 'yung pipiliin mo pero hindi pa rin pala." From that moment, I heard his sobs. "Ganoon ba ako kahirap piliin, Enzo?" And there, I lost it. Hindi ko na rin napigilan ang mga luha ko.

"Hindi ka mahirap piliin, Matt."

"Kung ganoon, bakit hindi ako? Bakit si Yuji pa na kakarating lang sa buhay mo pero siya na agad. Ako na dati pang nandito, wala talagang pag-asa. Bakit ba hirap na hirap kayong piliin ako?" Ang bigat sa pusong marinig ang lahat ng 'yon na nanggaling kay Matthew because he doesn't deserve to feel this pain. "Why do I always need to prove myself worthy? To you, to my family, to everyone!"

"Matthew, hindi sa hindi kita pinipili. Mahal na mahal kita kung alam mo lang. Matthew, I don't want to lose you."

"Well, Enzo, you already lose me."