He's My Secret (edited-ish)

57

I did my normal Saturday morning routine, except the laundry was already done so I didn't have to do that.

I checked the schedule I had posted on my room door and saw that I had planned on going to the library today after doing all that I had to do.

I surely didn't remember planning that but I guess my schedule wasn't wrong, it even had the subjects I should study written there and what I should do research on.

It's been so long since I looked on my schedule since I've been so busy with assignments and all but I resided actually kinda free today and I think it would be good to go to the town's library.

I cleaned up my room a bit, putting away books and a few shoes, spread my bed, folded all the laundry my mom did for me and placed them away.

I then opened my window and couldn't help but to stare over at Terrance's window. His window was closed but the curtains were open allowing me to see in.

Maybe I should text him - I thought. I mean we were a couple now and even Alexis and Leo texted and called each other regularly but then again almost everyone knew that they were a thing and maybe because they do it we shouldn't.

I don't want to be rude but their relationship doesn't seem to be, how should I put this?, stable?, it doesn't have that spark I want mine to have.

I still tock up my phone that was laying on its charger anyways.
Surprisingly I already had a message from Terrance
and two other persons.

Terrance's message said
'Meet you at the library'

He must have seen the schedule on my door, I mean he was observant at times.

The other two were from Alissa and my dad.

'Hey, do you think you could go shopping with me later?'

I did need a few new things and mom always said shopping is a way of releasing stress as long as you set a spending limit.

'Sure, I have studying at the library first though, so maybe around one, two O'clock' I replied.

The other message was from my father.

'Will you please call me or at least answer my calls ?.' I had blocked all calls from him, unfortunately, I seemed to have forgotten to block messages as well.

No matter what he was still my father and I couldn't change that no matter what, and although I hated what he had done I could never hate him, at least not fully.

I placed the notebooks I would be needing in my backpack, a highlighter and of course a pen.

I took some money out of my savings before leaving out. After closing up the house I checked my phone again.

'Totally, I'll see you around two, no later than two thirty though.' Alissa had replied.

After thinking about it so many times I decided to call my father once I was on the bus on my way to the library.

The bus took less than three minutes to arrive at the bus stop. I got on and thankfully the bus was basically empty and I got a window seat.

It was now or never I thought as I finally pressed on my father's number.

"Hello" he answered causing me to hesitate a bit, I hadn't thoughtfully about what I was going to say.

"Umm, hi dad," I responded

"Amanda?." He asked in disbelief, ever since I was a child I was very stubborn and if I stopped talking to you it would seriously take a miracle for me to talk back to you.
I have many cousins who destroyed my stuff spitefully in front of my face and I stopped talking to them for years, I guess I avoid things I don't want in my life or maybe it's my way of trying to teach someone a lesson.

"Yea."

"Are you ok ?." He asked most likely thinking that my reason for calling was because I wanted something.

"Yea, how are you?." I asked back. This conversation was slow and awkward.

"I'm fine ........... I'm fine." He replied as if still trying to figure out why I decided to call him.

"How's your mother?." At least he asked for her or was it a bad thing that he did, it felt touching and cruel at the same time to me.

"She's great actually."

"Good to know is she near you?." why would he want to know that.

" no actually, I'm on a bus heading to the library."

"Why?." To smoke weed and get laid did he seriously ask why.

"I'm going there to study," I replied which I really didn't have to tell him my business, mom said he's been sending us money, I guess sending maintenance money was the least he could do.

"Ho well, maybe we could meet up later and perhaps spend some time together." I could hear it In his voice that he knew he was trying his luck.

What was I five years old? , what was he even trying?. He went away and that's all on him, he switched families and that's kinda hard to accept.

I saw the look in my mother's eyes that morning when she revealed what had been happening and I heard her cry a few nights in her sleep, that was the part that got to me the most.

" I have plans for later," I told him honestly, but I would have still told him that even if I didn't have plans.

He was about to say something but I cut him off.

"I have to go, I'm almost at my stop." I half lied.
He mumbled a bye and I hang up.

I was a few corners from my stop but I was done talking to him.
There's a bus stop right in front of the library so I was going straight to my destination, thank god.

My father wasn't something that affected my mind anymore, why would it when I have my drug, the only drug that it seems safe to overdose on.

Plus if being with this woman makes him happy then let him be but the way he ended things with my mother and I wasn't right.

Plus he should be concerned about the fact that my mother isn't happy although she's trying to appear that way, I knew she wasn't. She had always bragged to me, my sister, other family members and friends about how my father was her first real love and that she'll never be with anyone else but him.

It always seemed sad for the fact that we're living in the twenty-first century but if it wasn't sad back then it sure was now.

Vote

Vote

Vote

VOTE