My Heart Hates Me

Chapter 16 Time And Regrets

Kirito lay on Vivian's sofa with a book in his hand. Vivian was doing the dishes and he suddenly had this desire to have attention. So, he kept the book aside and shouted.

"Aye! Aye, get your ass here!"
"What is it?" Vivian asked as she got out of the kitchen.
"I want food. I'm hungry I want food!"
"Okay okay. I'll make something. What do you want to eat?"

"Something Italian. "
"Okay" Vivian opened the fridge and took out few vegetables. She soaked them in water and she started preparing the dough.

"What are you making? Pizza?" Kirito asked as he looked into his phone.
"Why does everyone think Italian food is all about pizza and pasta?"
"Is it not? Just mix vegetables and dough, bake it-- you get Italian food, boom."
"Have you ever eaten an Italian vegetarian lasagna- Or let me correct myself, have you even eaten genuine Italian cuisine?" Vivian asked angrily.

"Not really," Kirito looked at her.
"Then you have no right to bad mouth their food in any way!" Vivian said with a serious look "Food brings people together, this fact must be accepted and respected"
"Whatever. It's just food in the end and its only purpose is to fill your stomach. Just cook me that lasagna or whatever it is" Kirito looked into his phone again.

Vivian shook her head and slid the plate aside. She heated the oven to 425°F, spraying 3-quart glass baking dish and sheet of foil with cooking spray. She took out a packet of lasagna noodles and cooked them properly. She took out the vegetables from water and began chopping them. She added onion to the sherry and cooked it.

Kirito got up and sat at the dining table.
"What are you doing?" Vivian asked as she sat next to him and looked into his phone.
"Move away" He said.
She got up and sat on the opposite side of the table. "That's better" Kirito said "Where's the goddamn food?!" He asked as he kept his phone.

"I need to bake it for thirty minutes or until it's bubbly around edges" Vivian said.
"Are you kidding me? It's been thirty minutes already. Leave it, I'll order something" He picked up his phone. He dialed the number and walked out of the room "Yeah, Pizza Corner."

She just sat and looked at the table. Soon, she heard the ring of the oven and walked towards it. She uncovered the baking dish. The top was light golden brown. She kept it aside for 5 minutes and then cut it into squares. The aroma spread throughout the house. Kirito stood at the balcony and heard his stomach grumbling. Vivian took one piece and stuffed it inside her mouth. As she picked up another, she saw Kirito's hand move towards the plate. She looked at him. He looked back "What? I'm hungry."

She smiled and continued eating. He ate one piece while looking into his phone, then took another piece, then another, then another. Finally he kept his phone aside and focused on eating. He finished the meal and relaxed his body on the chair, completely satisfied with his life. Vivian picked up the plate with a smile and kept it in the sink. Then, they heard the doorbell.

"Oh yeah, the pizza delivery man"
"Aren't you gonna eat that too?" Vivian asked with a mocking smile.
"Shut the hell of your mouth" Kirito got up "Watch and learn" He walked towards the door and open it.

"Who are you?" He asked the pizza delivery guy.
"Your pizza, sir-"
"I didn't order any" Kirito suddenly burfed.

Vivian covered her mouth to stop laughing. Kirito's face turned red as the pizza boy looked at him.

"Just take the fucking money and leave" Kirito said as he opened his wallet.
"Thanks for business, sir" He left the house. Kirito threw himself on the sofa. He dug his face into the pillows and groaned.

"That's so not like me." He said.
"Aww," Vivian laughed and sat beside him. Then, she suddenly got up and sat on the carpet, realising that he may not like it.
"You've spread me your stupid." He said.
"How come you never manage to make any sense?"
"Do I?"
"It's okay. I like this you. You seem more you like this"
"And how is it more like me?" Kirito asked as he peeped at her through the pillow.

"Because, your eyes always look so tired and full of guilt. They are deep but empty. It's like you simply just. . . Don't want to hurt people but you can't stop. You try being blind but you can't. You can shut your eyes, not your soul" She smiled. Kirito looked at her in a daze. He took a breath and looked at the wall on the other side.

"I can't do this anymore" He said. Vivian moved closer to him and pressed her hands on the sofa "Living has no limits"
"Life, huh. It's one of the most beautiful things in life, and the most terrifying too" He said.

"Not if you're not alone. When everything begins to fall, I'll be there. And even if the seasons change, my love for you won't" Vivian said.

"Okay," He got up "What do you want?" He asked. She smiled.
"Just your presence is enough. With just your presence, my world is complete."
"Leave me alone. Sleep on the bed tonight" He said and went back to laying down.

"As you say," She walked away. Kirito closed his eyes and tried sleeping.

'What an ethereal feeling'

He got up in the middle of the night and stood at the balcony with a beer bottle. He looked at the empty streets and the Tokyo tower far away.

"It's coming near. No wonder I'm so sensitive." Kirito looked ahead and took a sip of the beer.
'I'm alone again' Kirito looked at the dark sky.

"Well, you have me."
He looked aside "Who is there?"
"Hello, Kirito" Jericho sat on the railings of the balcony next to theirs.

"You again, you creep."
"Oh, you'll see me a lot so get used to it"
"If you fall from there, you'll die for sure"
"Don't worry, I can't die"

"Says every drunkard." Kirito looked ahead. There was an awkward silence until Kirito said "Would you mind getting lost? I'm trying to have a 'me time' here"
"I didn't stop you"

'This just got annoying'

"It isn't"
"Pardon?"
"Search for the truth, Ethan. But, even the truth is such a frozen piece and we are the snowflakes"

'Ethan?' Kirito said inside his head and looked at Jericho. There was no one there anymore. Kirito suddenly felt cold.
"I'm sure someone was there." He closed the door and walked in.

"There was" Jericho said as he stood beside him. Kirito gasped and moved away from him.

"Stop scaring me, you jerk! And how did you get here?!" Kirito got from the sofa.
"Huh?A dream? What a fucked up dream." He slept back again.

Jericho sat on the top of the Tokyo tower and looked into his watch, the hands of the watch were moving anticlockwise.

"Time is everything we have and don't"

-To be continued

My Heart Hates MeBecause I Love You