My Heart Hates Me

Chapter 48 Rain Of Dreams

"I ran back" Ethan said. His voice was getting sharper as he spoke. He seemed a bit restless, as if hurrying up and finishing all the narration. Words forcefully gushed out of his mouth "I ran to mom. He saw me and asked me how I came back"

"You brat!" Ruso said as he threw Ethan away from his mom "We sold you! Don't show your face to us again!"

"Ina! I came back for you!" Ethan said as Parhi looked at him. Ruso grabbed her hair "So you're the reason! Can you do anything except of being a block in the way of my son's happy life!" He said and moved to the kitchen.

He picked a knife and walked towards her.
"Ina!" Ethan shouted.
"Finally" She said with a smile and turned towards Ethan "I love you, Ethan" He slit her throat.

"Ina!" Ethan shouted as he ran towards her and she fell on the floor "Ina! Ina! Ina! Don't go! Ina!"

'You always smile, but you're not happy. If I wouldn't come back to you-- You wouldn't die. Ina...' Ethan cried. The effect of the implants broke.

His expressionless face had tears and sadness on it. "Ina... Without you... I don't want a world without you!" Ruso lit a cigarette as he threw the knife aside.

"You killed her- You psychopath!"
"I prefer creative."
"Fuck you!"
"Listen Ethan-"

"No! You listen! You are a pothole to the society! You're a criminal. And I was a mistake."
Ruso grinned "Ethan, see, you killed her. She died because she loved you- Everyone who loves you- dies"

'What did I do so wrong that everything bad happens with me?!'

"Come to tatay, Ethan" He said with a smile.
"Go away. Don't touch me."
"I won't hurt you. Let me put you to sleep with her too then" He said as he grabbed his neck and squeezed it. Ethan's dead eyes met the eyes of his father.

He got a panic attack in the midst of it. He scratched and gave out his silent scream.

"My brain couldn't process that level of pain anymore. I wanted to die. But Mr Hiomi came and saw me. The police arrested my father and took him away. They adopted me and gave me more than what I needed.

Their only wish was for me to lose my identity as Ethan. Their son's grave lies in Philippines with my name engraved on it. For this world, I died twenty two years ago and Kirito is alive."

"Ethan..." Vivian said.

"I tried dying many times, but everytime I was saved. I guess mom didn't wanted me there with her. I'd give her pain if I be there-- Mom-- Mom was--" He choked as his voice disappeared and his eyes widened. "He-- Ina-- I--" He covered his eyes, ready to hit another panic attack "Vivian--" Vivian held his hand "Don't speak anymore. I want to hear our heartbeats"

He turned towards her and she moved close to him. Under the shadows of his eyelashes, that's how close she was. She was breathing. She was alive. And somehow, the voice of her breath and her heart were everything that he needed.

They were breathing the same air as they looked into each other's eyes. "Your eyes, they are the only place I want to live in..." He said. They closed their eyes together and opened up their hearts together.

"I love you, Ethan. I love you. You are you, no matter what name you are given, you are still the man I love" She said as she pressed his face.

"I love you too, Vivian. You won't leave me, right?" He asked as he looked into her eyes. She smiled "I can't. I'm an angel" She said.

"Yeah, you are" He said with a smile "No wonder... I want to protect you. I wanna run away from here, to a place where there is no one but us. I don't want money or luxury. I'm a simple person. I want to be the only one who gets to live with you and see you everyday"

He hugged her and pressed his forehead on her shoulders "Want to... Go to Philippines once... with you" He said. "Sure, let's go" She smiled and touched his ears.

"Don't touch me." He said as he slapped her hand.
"Why? You don't like it?"
"I'm sensitive on my ears" He said.

"Just say you are horny when someone touches your ear" She said "I never said horny!" He shouted and she blew into his ear.

"You--" He said as he grabbed her hair and she began laughing. "You're weird" He said.
"How come?"
"Because I'm both calm and anxious when you're around."
"I just realized... How old are you, Ethan?"

"Me? I'm 29"

"Wow, love!" Lucus said as he pressed his chest while sitting on the Tokyo Tower.
"Can you feel that?" Fate said.
"My chest feels fluttery so I guess that how love feels like" Lucus said.
"You should return her antabulam"

"I will, later. There's just one more death and then I will"
"His life is reducing, isn't it?"
"Well... Yes" Lucus said with a sad smile. He got up and snapped his finger. The world began moving again.
"I told her not to make intense physical contact with humans. Seems like she has forgotten it."

"I'm sure life won't forget it" Fate said "Knowing her, she's worse"
"Let's just hope that God give the rain of dreams-- A sign of seasons" Lucus said as his eyes turned grey.

- To be continued

My Heart Hates Me Because I Love You