CLICHÉD

C-30

C-30

Jisung's POV

What is she sad for when I'm here?

We were so happy earlier but since we arrived in the classroom, Y/n became pouty. She keeps looking around as if she's expecting someone... I'm the one who's with her but her mind is occupied by him.

That's not fair.

Who am I kidding? I'm just jealous.

I used to be the only friend that she has.

I used to be the only one she hangs out with.

I used to be the only boy she shows her innocent smiles to.

I used to be the only neighbour who walks with her to and from school.

I used to be the only schoolmate who forces my friends to buy the drinks she makes in her elective subject because she's too shy to sell them.

I'm such a fool for setting aside the feelings that came with every action and thinking that everything I did was platonic. Now, I'm only the loser who used to be there for her because he came and I can clearly see that she's happier.

We're walking through the hallway after lunch with Y/n sporting a pout.

"Hey, it's fine."

"He could've at least told me that he wasn't going to school today."

"Don't you think it's a blessing in disguise? Because at least you have me."

"Maybe it is." She giggles.

We walk slowly as we still have a lot of time to spend before the next class starts.

"Jisung, it's been bugging me for a while and I really need an answer," Y/n starts.

"Sure, what is it?"

"How do you know if you like someone?"

I stop on my tracks upon hearing her question. I know it would eventually come but I didn't expect it to sting so much. I try to smile as I look at her curious face.

How do I know if I like someone?

It's when I look at you and regret every second that we spent together because I realised my feelings too late. It's when I just can't say anything because I'd rather be a friend than none at all. It's when I want to scream every little thing I like about you but I'm not even brave enough to try. It's when I blame myself for letting you go without even trying my luck. It's when I know that I'll constantly ask myself if I gave up too early and blew my chance so easily. Worst of all... It's when I know that I'm such a coward and you don't deserve someone like me.

"There's really no exact explanation or reason because when you like someone, you just do. For example... I want to spend a lot of time with you, I want to talk to you even with the most nonsense topic, I find everything you do adorable, I won't let you go without trying my best, I won't give up on you, and I'll be brave and confess my feelings before it's too late." I try to laugh. "Do you get it?"

"The person you like must be so lucky," she says.

"You flatter me!" I swallow the lump in my throat. "Whoever the person you'll like is luckier."

She smiles softly and a blush blooms on her face. I would feel happy but I know that it's not for me.

"I think I do like someone," she says shyly.

I poke her shoulder.

"You're not sure?" I tried to ask her jokingly.

"F-Fine... I like someone!" she says surely this time.

"Ah... My noona likes someone, she's already a grown up!"

I tried to laugh with her to keep me sane, I really did... but I can't stop myself from breaking no matter what. My lips quiver as I laugh the pain off my system.

"Can I have a hug?"

"Of course-- hey, why are you tearing up?"

"Nothing... I'm just happy for you, I guess."

"You're not sure?" she asks, copying my voice from earlier.

"Fine, I'm happy for you!"

"Thanks, Hannie."

Hannie... That basic nickname, making me smile through the pain. I shouldn't have started calling her noona. I thought it would bring us closer, but it only brought my romantic pursuit to an end.

She giggles and finally hugs me. I wrap my arms around her waist and bury myself in her warm embrace that lasts for a few seconds, but it'll stay with me for so much longer.

The bell rings and she goes back inside. I wait for Felix and Seungmin who came back from the library looking as done as ever.

"Dang! The librarian is stricter than my Asian folks. How can we chew without making a sound?" Felix complains.

"If I get banned from going there, it's on you." Seungmin grumbles.

Felix turns to me. "Bro, please tell me that our sacrifice didn't go to waste."

They both stare at me impatiently for an answer and when I shake my head with a defeated sigh, they groan and slap my back in unison. Felix puts his arms over mine and Seungmin's shoulders and we all enter like I didn't just tell them about my unrequited crush.

I pass by her desk and stick back the hours that I borrowed from Minho behind her chair. Something inside me drops as I watch her finally see it, running out excitedly that she forgot to say goodbye to me.

"Ouch." Felix clutches his chest as he looks at the door and back at me. "It's okay, dude. You tried. At least we all have matching keychains with her."

Seungmin pats my shoulder as he looks at my bare wrist. "For the record, yours is the prettiest."

I gently hold the keychain she made for me with cheesecake and squirrel charms hanging from it, making me smile a little. At least she knows the things I like, she just forgot to put her name on it. She wouldn't know anyway, because it's only for me to keep until my heart stops throbbing for her.

••••••••

This is why you should listen to Mr. Li from Chapter 8. It's totally Mrs. Han's fault though. Her son became the 2nd-lead because she's always making Jisung run those errands. Totally not me. Heh.