URBAN

FORTY TWO

Ashanti

"Ris," I said in a soft tone as I entered his room. He was sat facing the window. I walked up to him slowly and felt his curly hair as I sat on his bed. "What's up?"

He glared at me with a clenched jaw.

"Ris, what's going on? Why are you so angry at me?" I asked.

He opened his mouth to speak then grunted as he shut his eyes. "Go away,"

"Ris..." I sat up and sat on the window sill so he was facing me. "Please... I don't know what I did wrong,"

He raised his eyebrows. "Check your fucking phone. How many times have I called you and you aired me?" he asked. "You've had time to post on insta and snap and get a whole boyfriend but you didn't have time to answer my phone calls,"

I sighed. I know he's been calling me but I've been so busy with uni and everything. He was calling me a lot during the whole 'meeting' situation and I was so tied up with Keem, Rico, my own mental health... I restricted my usage on my phone, just for my own mental health so I could focus on my feelings a bit more but I know I was supposed to call him back a while ago but I just didn't.

I'm wrong for that.

There's no excuse.

He's my little brother.

"I'm sorry," I said.

He looked at me as he shook his head and crossed his arms.

"But I'm here now," I smiled a little. "You can talk to me now,"

"I can't," he said almost immediately. "You've changed. And I don't like it,"

I frowned. "How have I changed?"

He didn't answer me, he just looked away.

I ignored it and sighed again. "Amaris, please, tell me what's wrong. Lexi said you were cry-"

"I weren't crying," he cut me off.

"Okay," I nodded. "But you were upset?"

"I was," he agreed. "I broke up with my girl,"

"What?" I widened my eyes. Ris has been going out with this one girl, Sasha, since primary school. "What happened?"

He still kept a hard face. "We just broke up. She said she weren't feeling it no more... I didn't wanna move moist so I said 'same'... and we broke up. It was calm, there's this other girl that I fucked-"

"Wait, slow down. You lost your virginity?" I asked.

He shrugged. "Yeah."

"To Sasha or the other girl?"

"Sasha. She lost hers to me as well. Couple months ago," he sighed. "She's a good beat, you know,"

"Ew, don't talk about her like that," I hit him softly.

He laughed a little. "Nah, but it was good. So good,"

"Protection? Please say you used protection," I bit my lip.

"Yeah, I'm not stupid," he nodded.

"And you... had sex with another girl as well?" I asked. It felt weird talking to him about sex.

"After me and Sash broke up," he nodded. "And I felt so guilty after, I don't know why. Now I just miss her,"

"But that's your fault, you told her you weren't feeling the relationship no more," I advised him.

"I was only agreeing with her, though," Ris looked at me. "I told Sasha I wanted to be with her again, that I missed her and she was like, she misses me too and she regrets breaking up with me but, no, cos I beat someone else she won't take me back,"