Jamilton Oneshots :)

Broken stars(pt 3)[Jamilton]

Content warning-HUGE hint at necrophilia(lams) and suggested ghost,dysfunctional family,drugs,suicide,same warnings as last time(ps in this John is trans.)

My name is Thomas Jefferson.
  My mother is insane.
Dad told me that when I was four, my mother   died coming home on a ferry. I didn't understand why Dad told me such a story until I was much older.

Not long after my mother's death, Dad and I moved into our current home. Dad is an architect; he spent a lot of time renovating our new home. Our new home didn't feel as spacious as it looked, but it was plenty big for us. Later, I went to school like other kids. One night, I dreamed of the pale woman. She had a sheet of paper filled with strange symbols, and she told me that the paper told her the future. I didn't believe her. Although I dreamed about the pale woman every night after, I never believed her predictions, the words of the stars.

Until I met Alexander Hamilton.
Because I wanted love.
That's humanity for you.

I'm back home early.The living room has never been so dim in my memory. Day or night, the lights and the TV have always been kept on.
"What are you doing?"
I walk in front of the mirror facing the TV. I press against the glass and look in. I see what he doesn't want me to see: the pale woman and her prison cell.
"One-way glass?" I stare at him. "Daddy, I guess our living room isn't so small after all."

My name is Thomas Jefferson.
My mother is insane.
My father is an excellent architect. He built a secret chamber into our living room, where he has imprisoned my mother for more than a decade. The pale woman has never been a dream. It took me a long time before I understood this, but I continued to insist that she was just a dream. Like the story he told me about her drowning.
Before we lie to each other, we always have to successfully lie to ourselves.

"When did you find out?"
"When I realized that I always felt extra sleepy after drinking the milk you gave me."
My father doesn't know that although the drugs could put me to sleep, they couldn't stop me from waking up in the middle of the night to find the pale woman.

He would surely reply that he did it for me. He didn't want others to know that I had a mad mother.
"Drink this. You haven't been getting enough sleep." I bring out a glass of warm milk from the kitchen and put it in front of him. I look at him solicitously.
He drinks it down. I knew he would. No matter what I had put in it, he would have drunk it.
Anything would be better than having to face me like this.
"When did she start to say those crazy things?" I sit down in front of him, my hands gently covering his trembling knees.
"She was always different, even when we first met. She said she heard strange voices. She was always very interested in the exact time and place of people's births. She disliked some people for no reason at all. I just attributed those to harmless quirks. But then you were born, and she—" He looks up at me, and continues only with some effort. "She calculated your fate by the astrolabe, and said that you were a child destined to alter the talk of the stars; you had to be protected. She became more and more deranged—"
"You got scared."
"I don't know if she's really crazy. Some things have come to pass the way she predicted. No, I wasn't scared of her. But you didn't see how others were looking at us."

Before he closes his eyes, I ask my last question. "Did you stop loving her a long time ago?"
"No, not at all. I love her. Always have."

My name is Thomas Jefferson.
I don't have a father, and no mother either. I can change the talk of the stars; that is, I can change fate.

Tomorrow morning, I'm going to get to school on time. I'll continue to pretend to be a student as if nothing has happened. I'm not going to pretend to be like the others, and I'll never allow anyone to hurt me again. I'm going to be myself, completely. Once you know how to change fate, this is not difficult.

The pale woman should be happy. I believe her, and I'll fulfill her prediction. I've copied her astrolabe, and I've tried to move her stars. As my first experimental project, she died. I didn't want her to die, but I don't need an excuse to absolve myself. There's no question I killed her. Still, she should be happy.

James will make up with me. That's what his stars say. The stars also say that he wants many other things.

⚠️(NECROPHILIA,SUICIDE AND SMUT)⚠️
At the next full moon, nude pictures of John will appear in the inbox of every student. That night, John's stars will become utterly fragile. He'll want to die; he'll hang himself from the tallest pole in the school, where his nubile body will swing in the wind like a leaf.
On that night, the fragrance of his feminine body, the smell of death, and the stench of his excrement will attract Alexander Hamilton to his corpse. He'll be like some lost worker bee, confused by the smells, hovering around the dangling boy. Even death won't be able to completely stop the cinnamon aroma of his body. He'll be so entrancing. Especially then. Serene, calm, a chocolate sea calling to him.
If not for fate, why would he pass by just then? If not for fate, how could he have been able to light the fire in the gale?

Alexander will loosen the rope and let John down. His body will still be warm, filled with the scent of  South Carolina. His natural, tanned skin will glow and be filled with the elasticity of youth. He'll be especially attracted by his round, smooth legs, covered by his excrement.

On that night, he'll experience unprecedented levels of hunger and obsession, his blood boiling in his veins. Death will swell his blood vessels, will make him feel harder and stiffer than he's ever felt. By the time his hands reach into his blouse,removing his binder and greedily kneading those chocolate breasts, he'll no longer be an insect driven mad by the rotten stench of the corpse flower. He'll no longer be lost. He'll have encountered himself. He'll lick those purple lips, and then gently wind himself around that tongue, again and again, tirelessly. That will be how he confirms who he is. He'll understand what he fears; he'll know what he yearns for; he'll know himself.

He'll think that I've moved his stars, making him eat it.
But he'll be wrong. I haven't moved his stars at all. From the moment of his birth, his stars have said that he'll consume the pale woman.

"When you move the stars, you change fate. When you move the stars, you also break them. Don't move the stars lightly."
Those were the pale woman's final words to me before she died.

Many stars have been broken tonight, and many more will break in the future. Even so, the sky will never be completely dark.
There will always be a star that remains eternally lit. A star that doesn't need my guidance.

My frail lover, come to me. We'll be bonded together on a foundation of evil.
From now on, you can blame me the way you blame fate.
I am your star.

(28/5 edit: you guys know this is sorta a soulmate au right like alexander and thomas are soulmates because thomas broke the system thomas had a different soulmate before this)

Breathe if you hate me.
yea,me too.
(1352 words)