Jamilton Oneshots :)

light underneath the darkness [Jamilton]

not strictly related but this is basically thomas only has a few days left, they're married (and old) and they make the most of it. (age in this fic—
80+ - thomas  late 70's - alexander)

"why haven't you told me earlier?"

"well it's not everyday that your husband gets a flesh eating sexually transmitted infection, who would want their significant other to worry?" (you can imagine it as stage 4 cancer)

"well, thomas, not everyone has been through what we have! how many days do you have left?"

"three."

"what the f—"

they didn't have much time left, but he would still care and love thomas like usual. he wasn't ready to say goodbye, heck, he didn't even know how to say goodbye, let alone after so many years of being together. thomas certainly hadn't done him any favours at all by telling him that late. it's not like they had many days left on this earth, and thomas is still older than him, that doesn't go away with age, but in your late 70's, the wisdom of your years goes away when you panic. they've been through so many summers, nights spent sleeping on the loveseat after movies, too many softly spoken words of love whispered before sleep that he couldn't even fathom the thought that all that would be gone in three days. what would one do in this situation, honestly?

in the next three days, they've spent every moment together. life goes by, and as each day passes alexander still hugs thomas tight and makes sure they're both warm before sleeping. days pass, but when have they not? life is slow at monticello, where nights are silent and the life around them is mellow. how could it not? the house itself seemingly knows it's constructor is going to die, and for once alexander doesn't find himself worried about anything. it's almost a slow wait til the inevitable. and when thomas is on his deathbed, he'll still stay, just like he always did.

life is a inevitable force. when the day comes, alexander is just the tiniest bit nervous. who wouldn't be, knowing your lover could expire at any moment, that is, until thomas collapses in bed. he holds thomas' weathered, worn hand in his own,squeezing it tightly, offering some grounding and comfort to thomas.

"how are you feeling?"

"I'm nervous."

alexander can empathise. you can't reverse the inevitable. it's a force that can't be stopped, and nobody's ever ready for the unknown. nobody's ready to suffer the taste of grief, the pain of suffering, but right now, holding his husband's hand in his, he feels nothing at all. as someone who's always a storm, his brain never quieting, he's never felt this calm. he's made his peace with this situation.

"thank you, thomas, for being in my life."

"thank you, alexander, for being the light in an endless dark sea."

"I love you." "I love you too."

and just like that, thomas goes limp, surrounded with the love he's built within his lover and him.

alexander whispers, "goodbye, love. I'll see you on the other side."

it could be a trick of the light, but he swears he sees thomas smile.

———
(bonus! reincarnation)

"watch it!"

with the spill of a coffee, alexander hamilton, 18, meets thomas jefferson, 19, and being the kid who was subjected to so much change when he went into college, his mother dying, his father finding another mistress, he finds comfort in the only person who's a constant in his life, the light underneath the darkness.

thomas.

———
yeah, I hate me too!
anyway, it's been exactly 7 months since i started writing. we're almost done with this book, with 14 chapters left. ;)

[635 words]