The Mistake [ Jimin FF ]

By my side

Y/N: Where are we going?

Jimin: It's a surprise.

Y/N: Jimin just tell me.

Jimin: I know I've been away a lot because of my work, so I thought it'd be nice for us to spend some more time together.

Y/N: Jimin... I appreciate your efforts, but a couple of dinners and fancy clothes won't buy you my trust again. And it certainly won't fix us.

Jimin: I'm well aware of that, Y/N... Just... Can you at least even try to work this out with me??? You're not putting any effort into rebuilding our relationship...

The pained expression on his face made my intestines curl up into a knot, and all I wanted was to throw myself onto him and tell him that I loved him but I couldn't... He seemed hollow... The Jimin I knew wasn't there no matter how hard he tried to mask it. Unfortunately, to some extent that was my fault...

Jimin: This here... US takes two. So far, I'm the only one doing anything...

His head fell but I just didn't know what to answer him. All I wanted after we separated was to forget him because of how he made me feel, but even though I wanted, I couldn't. I even thought of going back to him at some point. I missed him so much, that I simply couldn't function properly. However, that thought dissipated as soon as I found out he married Isabell...

I promised Valeriya not to leave the Institution until she'd finished the mission because even though I no longer took part in it, she always told me everything that was happening and wanted me to be next to her throughout the process. It wasn't easy to stay... Not at all, but if I was in her place I would have asked the same. After all, now she was dealing with everything and in the end, she was going to end up hurt. That was why I needed to be there for her. At least in the form of a friend. That obviously wouldn't apply anymore as she chose the mafia as well.

I purposefully tried avoiding Jimin at all costs, but as you can see that was pointless. After everything between us, I still wanted to be with him. I still craved for his touch... I was such a fool. At the day of the last mission, I was determined to end it all, but with finding out about our childhood friendship, something in me just couldn't do it. I probably wouldn't have done it even without this information because my love for him wouldn't have allowed me. So, after I woke up from the coma, I came up with another plan. Yes, I was well aware my plans didn't usually work, but I still came up with one.

I still loved Jimin and listening to him during my coma led me to believe that he never stopped either. Maybe it was my broken soul that wanted me to believe that, but after I found the balance between my heart and my mind I knew what I had to do.

I was going to leave the Institution for good and was going to join Jimin in the mafia as long as it was my way. The good within me was now sharing me with my bad. After long consideration, the mafia didn't seem as vile as it used to be. Being good brought me nothing but heartbreak. So, why not switch sides. It was simply different preferences and different opinions. The world that we lived in was a dog eat dog world. Being good or being bad played little role in the real world. Despite this, I still held to my beliefs and decided to change some rules within the mafia. I knew it was going to take time, but with Jimin by my side, it was definitely going to work. All I needed to do was get rid of Isabell.

Don't get me wrong. I wasn't using him, but if he wanted us to be together things needed to change not only between us but in the mafia as well. I was ready to be by his side, as long as I saw enough effort coming from him.

I took a different turn to my road and decided to start a new life. The old me was always going to be with me, but it was the old me. People change and so did I.