kisses in the wind ~ lil peep

TWENTY

V I X E N ~ june 1st, 2017

"i love you gus but i think we need to talk," i sit in the bed as the morning sun shines through the window. 

"what?" he frantically comes and sits on the bed. 

we were dressed getting ready to go to the studio. 

"i think i want to go back to manhattan," i shake my head fiddling with my fingers. 

"are you serious right now baby?" he takes my hands trying to look me in the eye but i refuse to make eye contact because i knew it would ruin the april fools joke. 

"gus, i am serious. i have enjoyed every moment with you, i am happy i help you overcome your addictions i just think i need to take some time to better myself and you need the time to work on yourself," i remove my hand from his. 

"no, vixen y-" 

"happy april fools," i wink kissing him softly on the lips.

he looks at me confused. 

"fuck you," he pouts. 

"scared you didn't i?"he frantically nods his head 

"stop that shit, save it," he shakes his head. 

we all go to the studio, esha and i spend the first half really listening to the music they were making. 

"bother me, tell me awful things, you know i love it when you do that helps me get through this without you," esha and i look at each other. 

gus was writing some really good stuff out here in london, i knew he was taking all the opportunities he was getting and utilizing them the best he could. he didn't have his management screaming at him that he needed to get things done and he didn't have the stress of people constantly being in his house. overall i think gus was mentally doing a lot better. 

esha and i mutually decided we were going on a walk while the boys finished recording. gus gave me a really hard time about going. like a really hard time. to the point where esha told me we should just stay.

so we ended up not going for the walk. we sat in the studio the whole time with him. until finally, he called it quits, earlier than usual, in the evening. 

when i asked why he had called it off at 4:30, he told me had a surprise and he had wanted me to dress really nice for it. 

he wouldn't tell me the surprise the whole car ride back so by the time we got home i gave up on asking. 

i got dressed in a light pink silk dress that i adored. i made it in one of my design classes at FIT and it just fit me so perfectly. it hugged every curve and the silk texture made the dress even more high end when i really only made it from $10. i loved FIT because it taught me so much.

i did a cute pink makeup look. i learned makeup from esha, she went to this thing when she was in junior high where she would only go to her academics and then go there for these hair and cosmetics classes. she knew everything. a little MUA. 

i paired it with some dainty homemade chain necklaces i got off depop. a couple of layered necklaces. i grabbed a small white wallet and put some stuff in it including a xanax. 

if i couldn't go in with it i would take it before. 

i walked out of the bathroom connected to gus's bedroom to see him dressed in a hot pink latex material suit. but he didn't have a shirt on displaying every single one of his chest pieces. 

i go over to him and put my hand on his bare chest. 

"that's pretty hot," i smirk and kiss him quickly before pulling away," he groans and pulls me back.