Worth It

(18) To Be Ignored

The video above is called I Really Wish I Hated You by Blink-182. I do not own this song or video, but thought that it kind of went with the chapter. So, if you're curious, give this song a listen! Happy reading. Vote. Comment. I really appreciate you sticking around!! It means more than you could ever know, my dudes! <3 <3 :)

Ignore

I never thought that I would come to despise that word.

I thought I wanted to be ignored, but if that were true, then why does this feeling hurt so bad inside?

I thought that the feeling would go away. I mean, it has only been a week, but it still hurts like hell.

And when I try to talk to Cameron, he just brushes me off. No more lingering touches at dance class. No more talking to me. Period.

I thought that's what I wanted, but now that he is actually giving it to me, I'm not so sure.

"You okay?" Melia asked when she got out of the bathroom and saw me staring at the carpeted floor.

I nod and Melia eyes me skeptically, but leaves it alone. She goes into her kitchen and gets out a pan. "Want some eggs?" She asks me.

"Yes, please." I say eagerly. "Thanks." Melia laughs at my eagerness, but continues all the same.

We are currently at Melia and Hartley's apartment that is just a few minutes away from Princeton.

I know I should be happy. I'm with Melia and she treats me well.

"I'm going to take a shower, okay?" I tell Melia from in the kitchen and she gives me a nod with a slight smile. I blow her a kiss and she catches it with her hand and gives me a wink.

I should be happy.

I am happy.

I am happy.

Maybe if I say it enough, it'll be true.

Cameron

She went home with Melia. How do I know that?

I might have overheard them talking during rehearsal. It wasn't like I purposely stayed behind to hear their plans.

Nope. Not at all.

And I so didn't overhear Melia saying that she had an apartment or Zara jumping at the chance to be alone with Melia.

Nope. Didn't hear any of that.

And if I did? So what? I told her how I felt and she chose Melia. That should be it. Right?

"Are you okay?" Mom cracks the door open, her face peaking out.

"Mom," I say exasperated, putting my hands in my hair. "What have we talked about? Knock first!" I remind her.

She comes into the room fully, throwing her hands up in surrender. "I know. I know." She comes to sit on the bed next to me, her hand on my shoulder. "It's just," She takes a deep breath and I try to prepare myself for whatever it is she is going to say. "I haven't seen you this down since--"

I stop her before she can finish that sentence, walking to my closet to wear something a bit more cooler than just SpongeBob boxers. Although, if I'm being honest here. What is cooler than SpongeBob boxers?

"Everything is fine, mom. Don't worry." I say, sifting through my closet till I come upon sweatpants and a plain white sweatshirt. Good enough for me. Not like I have anyone to impress.