Persphyni : I am Darkness

14

I sat up, staring at the opening of the cave. The darkness being littered with clumps of moonlight. I could leave, I could leave right now. Get away from Bellamy.

But when I saw the girl sleeping behind him, I knew I had to stay. If grounders somehow ended up surging the cave, she would die. And it would be my fault.

"Damnit!" I hissed as my shoulder hit the rock of the cave wall. I've killed, I've seen death, why should I feel guilty? Why would it be my fault?

I knew the answer, deep in my subconscious. It would be my fault because I chose to leave her here, vulnerable. With the king of dumbasses.

I scoffed as I saw Bellamy sleeping peacefully. His usual scowl or smirk nowhere near his freckled and bruised face. If the grounders came I'd be the only one awake. Meaning I couldn't leave, unless.

I could take Charlotte and run. Go find Atom who I know is still out there no matter how many times Bellamy whispered to himself thinking I couldn't hear him. The acid fog had left, the adrenaline in me begged to get out of this cave. The darkness in me demanded I leave at once.

I shakily stood up, slipping my leather jacket on. Wincing as it rubbed against the slowly healing blisters and bloody skin of my left shoulder. I pulled my dagger from the sheath in my boots, remembering I needed to make it somehow attach to my belt so I can grab it easier.

I made my way to the entrance of the cave. My footfalls silent as I walked, never once looking back. I was just about to take a step outside when yelling turned me around.

"No!" It was Charlotte. I ran back to where she was sleeping.

"Charlotte, wake up." I was shocked to hear him awake. Even more so at his coddling tone.

"I'm sorry." She looked up as I got near them and looked away down at her hands. I was about to take a step closer when I realized, I didn't know how to handle this. But, Bellamy did.

"Does it happen often?" I watched Bellamy as his tone was soft and comforting. Seeing a side of him I never thought would exist. A side of him I never knew could exist in anyone.

"What are you scared of?" That was a pry, and judging by Charlotte's face she had her demons.

"You know what? It doesn't matter." He said after she didn't answer. "The only thing that matters is what you do about it."

"But, I'm asleep."

"Fears are fears." On a normal occasion I'd roll my eyes. But right now, his words were helping Charlotte. "Slay your demons when you're awake. They won't be there to get you when you're asleep."

Why do I have a feeling those words would backfire. He had already given her a knife and told her she's might be good at killing something. And he's now putting the idea of slaying a demon. I'll have to ask Clarke what she did to get in the box. That's where most demons lie.

"Yeah, but, how?" I started to walk towards the two, feeling I may need to interrupt to clarify for the girl.

"You can't afford to be weak. Down here, weakness is death. Fear is death." I sat down by the wall of the cave near them, now able to see Bellamy's face as well as Charlotte's.

"Let me see that knife I gave you." Charlotte slowly gave it to him. It already being in her lap didn't help my thoughts. I knew very little about this girl whom I had just met today, my guard up as I watched Bellamy grasp it.

"Now, when you feel afraid you hold tight to that knife and say, "Screw you. I'm not afraid.'" He handed the knife back to her, her hands smooth to take it.

"Screw you." She whispered, "I'm not afraid." I looked at Bellamy who simply gave her a look saying you can do better.

"Screw you." Her voice raised, "I'm not afraid." Bellamy smiled at the young girl, patting her knee as he moved back down to the floor.

"Slay your demons, kid. Then you'll be able to sleep."

Charlotte slowly laid back down, knife gripped in her hand. I stood up before she could fully fall asleep and knelt down.

"That rock doesn't look like a comfy pillow." My voice was a whisper as I gave her a small smile.

"No." I chuckled lightly as she sat back up.

"Here, I might have some rock hard muscle but they're softer than actual rock." I heard Bellamy snort, making me kick his leg as I climbed up to where Charlotte was sleeping. My arm tingling as I used it for stability.

I sat with my back to the cave wall, legs stretched out in front of me with my lower calves and feet hanging of the edge. Once I got situated I patted my thighs for her to lay on, her sleepy state already catching back up as she slumped on top of them.

I wonder if this is what it could have been if I had known my parents. Teaching me the world, caring for me, being my roots as I grew up, how to fight of nightmares when I was scared.

I felt her body sag, the motion meaning one of two things. And due to the fact she is still breathing, I'm going to go with the first. I stroked the sleeping girl's hair, feeling her subconsciously loosen up.

"They say it's what you make
I say it's up to fate
It's woven in my soul
I need to let you go

Your eyes, they shine so bright
I want to save their light
I can't escape this now
Unless you show me how"

This was dangerous. She was dangerous, he was dangerous, they were all dangerous.

"When you feel my heat
Look into my eyes
It's where my demons hide
It's where my demons hide
Don't get too close
It's dark inside
It's where my demons hide
It's where my demons hide"

I smirked to myself looking away from the young girl on my lap, when did I become such a wuss. I was dangerous. They should be worried about me. After all. I am darkness.