always...

chapter 1 - daisuga

mid june

the two boys had been together for the last 2 years. they had started dating around the middle of their first year together and they had never really had too many problems because they were always good at communicating with each other. that is until a few months ago.

suga sat in his bed, surrounded by countless pillows and was making yet another playlist to add to his 80 something other ones. the gray haired teen made a playlist for almost every type of mood he felt, and the one he made today was titled "longing". for him. by troye sivan, the night we met by lord huron, and i would do anything for you by foster the people were the first three songs he added.

god, i don't know what's going on with him. we always talk about things and i just wish he'd open up to me about this. but he'll talk to me eventually right? i just have to trust him on this.

flashback - mid april

"daichi? are you okay? you've been acting a little off lately and i'm starting to worry..." suga mumbled.

"i- it's nothing...ugh no, it's not nothing. i just...i- i don't know what to feel right now," daichi replied.

"babe, c'mon. what's going on with you? did your parents have another bad fight? or-?"

"suga, they're getting a divorce. they just dropped the news on me last week," he choked out.

suga paused for a moment, stunned.

"i love you daichi. you know that right? i will always love you. always. and i'm here for you always, just say the word. no matter what happens you can talk about this with me, okay?"

"i know, i know. i just feel so overwhelmed and stressed all of a sudden. my mom is keeping the house and my dad is moving out to the next town over. and they want me to live with them both so i'm going to have to switch houses every two weeks. and you know my brother is going to university in tokyo soon, so it's just going to be me at home and i don't know if i can-"

suga suddenly crashed his lips into daichi's. daichi was wide-eyed for a moment, but he slowly relaxed into the kiss, the taste of suga's lips fresh on his own.

he always tastes like coconut. god, everything about him is perfect.

suga wrapped his arms around daichi's neck as daichi pulled suga's waist closer to his body. suga pulled away first.

"you worry too much," suga whispered. he laced his fingers through daichi's and squeezed his hand. "i'm here for you always, and we will get through this together, okay?"

"okay."

end flashback

suga flopped onto his back on his bed and clicked shuffle on his new playlist.

i had all and then most of you

some and now none of you

take me back to the night we met

i don't know what I'm supposed to do

haunted by the ghost of you

oh, take me back to the night we met

suga's breathing hitched as he choked back a sob. his vision started to cloud up like a gray sky before a storm. raindrops began to fall, slowly but steadily. the downpour grew heavier and heavier.

he tasted salt on his lips and on the tip of his tongue. he tried to open his eyes and saw nothing but blinding rain. the drops streaked down his face and dripped off his chin, soaking his pillow case.

he stared down at the slowly expanding puddle on his pillow and sobbed even harder.

yet another tear soaked stain...he thought to himself.

he wanted to trust daichi, he really did. but no matter how many times he tried to talk to him about the divorce and how he felt, his boyfriend just shut him out and pushed him away. suga longed for daichi's warm embrace.

he understood that daichi was hurting, but he was hurting him too. all suga wanted was to help daichi and be there for him through everything, but everytime he tried, daichi tossed him aside.

the neglect was getting to his head, and as much as suga tried to be patient and let daichi open up on his own, he was never able to stop worrying about his beloved.

take me back to the night we met...